Wilder Hearts

Adoption was the decision she’d wished her mother had made when she’d been pregnant with Simone. Instead, her mom had botched up the whole mother/daughter thing, something that continued to plague them both to this day.

Simone flushed the toilet, just to make Mike think she’d had the usual reasons for locking herself in the bathroom, then washed her hands and dried them on a white, fluffy towel reserved for guests.

Not that she and Woofer had many of them.

Dr. Ella Wilder stopped by sometimes. So did Isobel Suarez, the hospital social worker who’d become a friend.

Of course, Mike was here now—and waiting for her.

She looked in the mirror, caught the frumpy, pale image looking back at her.

Her hair, which had been put into a just-hanging-out-at-home ponytail earlier, had come loose. And she wasn’t wearing any makeup whatsoever.

Dressed in her favorite pair of well-worn jeans and a Rosie the Riveter T-shirt, she was a mind-boggling contrast to the chic, sexy woman who’d invited Mike into her house and into her bed five weeks ago.

But she didn’t feel like putting on makeup or a happy face. Nor did she want to draw attention to herself in a feminine sense.

After all, look what had happened when she’d dressed up for that cocktail party and had pretended to be someone she wasn’t.

But she couldn’t very well go out looking like a total frump, although she wouldn’t change her clothes. How could she when she wore a shirt with Rosie the Riveter rolling up a sleeve and proclaiming, “We can do it!”

So trying to draw upon Rosie’s confidence and determination, she removed the rubber band and ran a brush through her hair, leaving it down. Then she dug into her makeup drawer and pulled out a tube of lipstick. But after taking off the cap, she paused.

She really didn’t want Mike to think she was getting dolled up for his benefit. Of course, the sexy paramedic didn’t need that kind of encouragement.

The first time he’d come on to her—more than a year ago—had been in the hospital doctors’ lounge, where she’d been pouring herself a cup of overbrewed coffee. She was wearing a pair of blue scrubs and was close to finishing up a long, grueling twelve-hour shift.

“Hey,” he’d said. “I’ve got tickets to a concert at the Stardust Theater on Thursday. And I’ve asked around. We’re both off that night.”

She’d caught him looking at her several times in the past, and the intensity in his gaze had always spiked her pulse. Mike O’Rourke was a handsome man, and any woman would be flattered to know she’d caught his eye.

But Simone hadn’t expected his interest in her to take a romantic turn, and her senses had reeled.

“I…uh…I’ve already got plans,” she’d lied, scrambling to come up with an excuse.

And she’d been putting him off ever since, even though he told her he was prepared to wait until she was ready to give “them” a try.

He’d never been pushy, but now that they’d slept together, his determination seemed to have grown stronger.

So she re-capped the lipstick without using it and put it away. Then she slid the bathroom drawer shut and headed to her bedroom for her purse and a light sweater—just in case. The New England weather was always a bit unpredictable in April, although the past few days had been remarkably pleasant.

When she returned to the living room, Mike was standing by the door, ready to go.

He held Wags in the crook of his arm and opened the door for her with his free hand. Then he waited on the sidewalk while she made sure Woofer had fresh water and locked up the house.

“Where do you suggest we go to find dog supplies?” he asked.

“There’s a pet store on Lexington, across from Prudy’s Menu. It’s called Tails a Waggin’, and they’ll have everything we’ll need.”

“All right. I know where that is.” He opened the passenger door of his Jeep Wrangler, and after she climbed into the seat, he handed Wags to her. “He hates that box if he’s awake. Why don’t you hold him.”

Simone took the squirming pup. She had to admit, it was a cute little thing. But she needed another dog around the house like she needed a hole in the head, and she couldn’t help wondering what she’d gotten herself into.

Wasn’t her life going to be complicated enough for the next seven or eight months?

“Thanks for coming with me,” he said. “I don’t want to forget anything.”

“No problem,” she said, although she wasn’t being entirely truthful.

She really wasn’t in the mood to go anywhere. Not when she had a stack of laundry to do at home. She’d also planned to clean out the refrigerator and wash the windows, chores she saved for her day off. And she’d told Woofer she would take him for a long walk this afternoon.

Not that the dog would hold her to it, she supposed. But some things easily became habits that were hard to break.

And speaking of habits, she couldn’t even imagine the effect a new puppy was going to have on her normal routine.

Of course, a baby would really shake things up.

Thank goodness she knew better than to open herself up to that.

Mike backed his Jeep out of Simone’s driveway and drove through Riverdale, an older part of town, where the houses near the river had been built in the 1940s. With only a few exceptions, the yards and structures had been kept up throughout the years.

“I’ve always liked this neighborhood,” he said, thinking it had a Norman Rockwell appeal.

“Me, too.” Simone glanced out the window, as though appreciating the maples, sycamores and the occasional hemlock that shaded the sidewalks and the street on which she lived.

When Mike and his brothers were in high school, they’d worked summers for their uncle, who was a building contractor. As a result, each of the boys could do just about anything—electrical, plumbing, drywall, painting—skills that could turn an old house into something special.

A lot of people might prefer to buy newer homes, but Mike was drawn to the quaint, nostalgic ambience of this particular neighborhood. In fact, he’d told his Realtor that he was looking for a fixer-upper but wouldn’t mind purchasing anything in Riverdale, should one of the properties become available.

“Did you have to do a lot of work after you moved in?” he asked, thinking about the cozy, two-bedroom brick structure she’d purchased.

“Yes, but it was actually fun to roll up my sleeves and watch things change before my eyes. I even took some of those home-improvement classes they offer at Hadley’s Hardware Store. I couldn’t afford to do everything at once, but I started by working on one room at a time. The first thing I did was to tear up the carpeting and refinish the original hardwood flooring. Then I painted.”

Overall, he had to say he liked what she’d done to the place, although his focus had been on more than beige walls and white crown molding the night he’d taken her home.

In fact, as they’d left the cocktail party, he’d stolen a kiss while the two of them stood next to his Jeep, and his hormones hadn’t given him or his brain cells a free moment until dawn.

He’d known their lovemaking would be good, but it had been better than either of them could have imagined, and they’d awakened like a pair of spoons, completely spent and sated.

Yet one night hadn’t been enough.

He slid a sidelong glance across the seat and saw that she was staring straight ahead and biting her bottom lip. Then she glanced at him, lips parting.

Had her thoughts gone in a sexual direction, too? Was she thinking about the pleasure they’d given each other in the antique bed in her candlelit room?

He suspected so, because her words seemed to have dissipated in the cab of the Jeep.

But he didn’t let the silence get to him. “I told Karen, Leif’s sister, that I’d be interested in buying something in this part of town, especially if it needed some work.”

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’ll keep my eyes and ears open. Mark Griffith, who lives with his wife and son on Ash, might have to be transferred to another office out of state. If so, he might be interested in selling.”

“That would work out great for me.” Since Simone didn’t comment either way about the possibility of them being neighbors, he let it drop.

Minutes later, he pulled the Jeep into a parking spot on Lexington, two spaces down from the pet shop, and turned off the ignition.

“How’d you know about this place?” he asked.

“Originally, Ella Wilder mentioned it to me.”

“She has animals?”

“Yes, a cat named Molly. She found the poor little thing injured and lying on the side of the road. A lot of people might have put her to sleep since she lost a leg, but Ella nursed her back to health.”

Mike never figured the young orthopedic surgeon as an animal lover, but then again, he hadn’t suspected Simone to be one, either. Not until he’d seen her with Woofer.

“One day, after shopping, I stopped at Prudy’s Menu to place a take-home order, and I noticed it across the street. Ella had said it was a mom-and-pop–type store and that it could almost be entertaining at times. So I decided to check it out. And that’s the day I met Woofer.”

“You’ve gotta be kidding. I thought pet stores only sold animals with pedigrees.”

“Actually, the Baxters allow several different pet-rescue organizations to hold adoption days at the store on weekends. And that’s exactly what was going on the first time I stopped in to visit.”

“Wait a minute.” Mike slid her a crooked grin. “You mean that you make a point of visiting the pet store even when you don’t have anything to buy?”

“Yes, I do that every once in a while. Millie and Fred Baxter are nice people. I first met them a year or so ago when Fred was brought into the E.R. after suffering chest pains.”

“Oh, yeah?”

Simone had always told him that she tried not to get attached to her patients, which is why she enjoyed working in the E.R. Most of the patients were just passing through. But obviously, she got attached to some of them.

“Fred had suffered a major heart attack,” she said.

“Obviously, he pulled through.”

Simone nodded. “Millie was trying to be tough for his sake, but I could see the fear in her eyes. They were pretty young to be going through something like that, and for some reason, I was drawn to her. So when I was off duty that evening, I picked up a cup of coffee in the doctors’ lounge, then offered it to her. I sat with her for a few minutes, and we started chatting.”

Mike had seen Simone with her patients, and while she was good to all of them when they were in her care, she was able to detach when they were either admitted or discharged.

And she didn’t normally spend her free time visiting with them.

“What was so special about Millie?” he asked. There had to have been something that appealed to Simone, and he was curious to know what it was. To know what drew her to certain people.

Simone shrugged, then focused her attention on the puppy in her lap, her thoughts appearing to drift somewhere else.

When she glanced up, her gaze snagged his, tugging at his heart in that way only Simone could do. “I’m really not a romantic person, so you’ll probably think this is weird coming from me, but I think Fred and Millie are soul mates—if there is such a thing.”

There was. Mike suspected he and Simone were, too, but she hadn’t quite figured it out yet.

“Anyway,” Simone continued, “Millie was worried about losing Fred, which was understandable. But she mentioned they’d been trying to…” Simone paused and glanced out the passenger side of the window, as though distracted and drifting off topic.

“Trying to what?” Mike asked, steering her back to the conversation they’d been having.

She cleared her throat. “They’d been trying to have a baby for years and had finally given up. In vitro and other expensive fertility treatments are out of the question, since they’re new business owners and have poured their savings into the store. They’d just started the adoption process when Fred was brought into the E.R. However, Millie realized that his heart condition might make it more difficult for them to adopt.”

Again, Simone glanced out into the distance, but Mike could see the cogs turning, her mind drifting, and he wished she’d share those thoughts with him.

He couldn’t imagine his future without kids. He adored his nieces and nephews and looked forward to the day he could give them a couple of cousins to play with.

She obviously felt badly that Millie couldn’t have the family she’d dreamed of. Maybe that was because Simone harbored some secret maternal urges, too. And if so, that would play right into Mike’s hands.

Unless, of course, Simone had reason to believe that she couldn’t have children. Maybe that’s why she took such a strong stance against marriage or even a relationship.

“Adopting a child is a good option,” Mike said, just in case he’d touched on a sore subject. He wanted her to know that he’d be okay if she was infertile—disappointed, but okay. “And there’s always a need for good foster parents. So even if a person can’t have kids of their own, there are plenty of opportunities to be parents.”

“Yes, you’re right.” Her voice came out soft, burdened. “Millie’s the kind of woman who would make a great mother. And if I were a kid, I would have loved to have someone like her adopt me.”

One night at the hospital, he’d mentioned that he came from a big family and that he hoped to have a few children of his own someday. She admitted to being an only child and said she wasn’t big on kids.

But that couldn’t be true. She was terrific with the pediatric patients who came in to the E.R.

“You know,” Mike said, “not being able to have children wouldn’t be the end of the world.”

“You’re right. And honestly, Millie was far more concerned about losing Fred than her chance at adopting a baby. She loves him more than anything in the world and is glad to have him for as long as possible. She’s also resigned to the fact that their pets will be the only children they have.” Simone unhooked her seat belt, handed Wags to Mike and reached for the door handle. “Come on, I’ll introduce you to one of the nicest couples in Walnut River.”

Millie Baxter, a tall, slender blonde in her late thirties, broke into a smile that lit up the room when she spotted Simone enter the pet shop.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite nurse.” She left her position near the cash register and greeted Simone at the door with a warm hug.

The Baxters tried hard to remember the names of not only their customers, but also their customers’ pets, but they didn’t offer hugs to just anyone.

“Where’s Woofer?” Millie asked.

“He’s at home and not all that happy about it. But he’d really be pouting if he knew where I was. He loves coming here with me to shop, although part of the reason is because of those meaty treats you always give him.” Simone turned to Mike and introduced him to Millie, calling him her friend and mentioning that he was a paramedic.

“And who is this sweet little guy?” Millie asked, zeroing in on the puppy in Mike’s arms.

“His name is Wags,” Mike said, “and he’s going to stay with Simone until I find another place to live.”

“I’ll bet Woofer loves you,” Millie said to the dog.

“They haven’t met yet,” Simone said. “And I’m not sure how Woofer is going to feel about sharing my time or having a houseguest.”

“Just take it slow and easy when you introduce them. There’s always a bit of an adjustment period, but I’m sure they’ll be the best of friends before you know it.” Millie looked at Mike. “Would you like me to hold Wags for you while you shop?”

“Thanks. I have a feeling we’ll be needing both hands.” Mike passed the puppy to Millie. “So, if you’ll excuse me, I’d better get a cart.”

“Where’s Fred?” Simone asked. She hoped he was feeling okay and hadn’t stayed home.

“Helen Walters purchased a new aquarium for her nephew, so he drove over to the boy’s house to help them set it up. He’s been gone quite a while, so I expect him back soon.”

The Baxters were very generous with their time and their expertise, so going the extra mile wasn’t surprising.

“That was sweet of Fred to help.”

“Aw, you know how Fred is.” Millie smiled, eyes crinkling. “If there’s anything he likes more than animals it’s kids.”

“Okay,” Mike said upon his return with a cart. “Where do we find the dog supplies?”

“They’re on aisle one.” Simone pointed to the right. “I’ll show you.”

As they strode through the small but well-stocked and -organized shop, Simone pointed to the basset hound snoozing on a blue pad by the cash register. She noticed that he was wearing the usual bandanna around his neck. It was red this time, although the color and print usually varied from day to day.

“That’s Popeye Baxter,” Simone told Mike. “He comes to work with Fred and Millie each day and is practically a fixture around here.”

“Lucky dog.”

“Yes, he certainly is. The Baxters own quite a few pets.” All of which they referred to as “the kids.”

“Are the other animals here at the store?”

“Most of them are. Tina the cat is usually playing on a carpet-covered climbing structure in the kitty section. And Herb the parrot is perched in the bird aisle.”

Mike scanned the interior of the pet store. “I can see why you like to stop in and visit.”

“Can you?” she asked. She’d always thought animal lovers were a bit…over the top. But that was until she met the Baxters—and adopted Woofer. The big, goofy dog had really grown on her. She suspected that was because she and the mutt had a lot in common.

“Honey,” a man’s voice rang out. “I’m back.”

“That’s Fred.” Simone nodded to the short, heavyset man who’d entered the store through the back door. “I’ll introduce you after we finish stocking up on supplies.”

Ten minutes later, they’d filled the cart with a doggie bed, chew toys, puppy food, a pet carrier, leash and collar.

“Hey, wait.” Mike threw in a bulky piece of knotted rope and a rawhide bone. “We don’t want Woofer feeling left out.”

She figured the toys would all become community property eventually. “You don’t need to worry about Woofer.”

“Maybe not, but my sister Kari just had her second baby—a boy. And she bought a doll and a toy stroller for his big sister. She didn’t want her little girl to be jealous of the new baby.”

See? Simone knew nothing about that sort of thing, which was another reason she would make a lousy mother, if given the chance.

“You know,” Mike said as they approached the checkout counter, “speaking of kids, this kind of feels like we’re preparing a doggie nursery.”

The hint of a chuckle tickled the tone of his voice, but Simone didn’t find anything warm or amusing in the words.

They weren’t co–dog owners.

And there wasn’t anything parental about their relationship, even though a child they’d created was growing in Simone’s womb.

A sense of uneasiness settled over her as she thought of giving up the baby. But the child deserved a loving home with two parents, a couple who would lovingly prepare a nursery in anticipation of the child they’d always wanted. And she tamped down the momentary discomfort.

Simone glanced at Millie and recognized a soulful longing that whisked across her face, a momentary stab of grief.

It wasn’t likely that Millie and Fred would ever have the chance to decorate a nursery. And the shame of it all was that they’d make great parents. If given the opportunity, they’d welcome a new baby…

Simone’s musing took an interesting turn.

Maybe Fred and Millie would want her baby.

Wouldn’t it be easier to give the child to people she knew? A couple she trusted?

It was certainly something to consider. And she hoped that Mike would see the wisdom in it—when the time came to tell him that during their one night together they conceived a baby.

She sure hoped he wouldn’t give her a hard time about the decision she’d made.

Still, her tummy tossed and turned.

What if Mike didn’t agree? What if he didn’t let up on her and tried to push her into something she knew was wrong—at least, for her?

“That will be a hundred and twenty-seven dollars and sixteen cents,” Millie said, drawing Simone from her musing.

Mike whipped out his credit card in a blur. Or so it seemed.

Simone blinked, feeling a bit dizzy and light-headed.

Whew. All she needed to do was to pass out. The dedicated paramedic and the dutiful suitor in Mike would have a field day with that.

Uh-oh.

A buzz filled her ears, and she reached for Mike’s arm, felt the bulge of muscle tense.

He turned and caught her eye, his smile morphing into a frown. “What’s the matter?”

“I…” Damn. She didn’t want to tell him. But if she didn’t, he was going to figure it out all by himself. “I think I’m going to…”

Her knees buckled before she could finish the thought.

Chapter Three

Mike caught Simone in his arms just before she crumpled to the pet-shop floor.

As much as he wanted to hold her close, to cling to the citrusy scent of her bath soap and shampoo, he gently laid her down and knelt beside her. He might be medically trained and competent in an emergency, but he wasn’t at all prepared for Simone’s collapse.

“Oh my gosh,” Millie said, hurrying around the counter to see what was going on. “Is she okay? What happened?”

Mike didn’t know for sure. “I think she fainted.”

Simone’s vulnerability damn near sent him reeling, and he took her hand, checking her pulse while assessing her respiration. He placed a hand on her forehead to gauge her temperature and found it cool, so she didn’t have a fever.

Her lashes, dark and lush against the skin that had gone pale, fluttered ever so slightly.

“Fred!” Millie called. “Come quick!”

Simone lifted her lids, blinking them a couple of times until her eyes searched Mike’s face, as though she was trying to focus.

When she tried to sit up, he stopped her. “Just lie still for a minute or two.”

“Okay.” She drew in a shaky breath, then slowly blew it out.

“How are you feeling?” Mike ran his knuckles along her cheek—God, he’d missed touching her.

“A little light-headed and buzzy, but nothing hurts.”

Again, she began to fold up into a sit. And this time, he placed his hands on her shoulders and gently held her down. “I’m calling the shots, and you need to lie still a little longer.”

She offered him a wry smile. “I thought paramedics were supposed to yield to the nursing staff.”

“Yeah, well, not when the nurse is incapacitated.” He tried to shrug off his concern, but couldn’t. What the hell had happened? And why?

Damn. He wanted to do so much more than tell her to stay put and to remain quiet, but she was conscious. And he couldn’t find any of her vitals out of whack. So he relied on his training to tell him she was okay when his heart was telling him to call 911 and ask for backup.

Deciding upon a compromise, he said, “As soon as you feel up to moving, I’ll take you to the hospital and get you checked out.”

“No, that’s not necessary. I’ll be okay.” She closed her eyes, but only for a moment. “This isn’t serious, Mike. Besides, it was my own fault.”

“What do you mean?”

“I haven’t eaten anything since yesterday at lunch, and I really should have grabbed a snack on our way out the door.”

He hoped she wasn’t dieting; she didn’t need to lose weight. She was in great shape. And even if she could stand to lose a couple of pounds, she ought to know that starvation wasn’t the way to go.

“I got a little light-headed and—” she shrugged her shoulders “—I passed out.”

She could say that again.