Every Time a Bell Rings

A door slams and I look down. Jim’s mam is leaving already. That flew by. She’s got her arm around him as he walks her to the gate. She actually walks straight through the cracked pavement slabs. Another good sign.

I watch them hug for ages and feel weird watching them, like I’m snooping. But I can’t take my eyes off them all the same. It’s a lovely moment and I’m envious again. He’s got one of his goofy smiles plastered over his face and that makes me happy at least.

Relief floods me as I realise that I’m happy to see him smile. Maybe I’m not such a bad person after all. I run downstairs two stairs at a time. I can’t wait to hear all about it.

‘Well, Jimbo, did she like your hair?’ I ask.

And before he says anything back to me, I know. His face looks different. He looks happier than I’ve ever seen him in the past two years. I mean, we’ve laughed a lot. Once we snorted so much that I even peed my pants.

‘She’s taking you home,’ I say.

He looks at me for the longest time. Then he nods. I make a tremendous effort to put a smile on my face, to make him believe that I’m happy for him. It must be working, I must be fooling him, because his goofy grin is back again.

‘She’s rented a two-bed flat in Ranelagh and the landlord has said that I can decorate my bedroom any colour I want.’

Green. He’ll pick green, because that’s his favourite colour.

I hear Tess sigh and the click of her lighter as she ignites another cigarette.

I’m losing him. Tess knows it. Jim just doesn’t know it yet.

‘How long do we have left?’ I ask. I’m surprised that my voice sounds okay, considering the fact that I want to cry.

‘You make it sound so dramatic, Belle,’ Jim laughs at me. ‘I’m just going to live somewhere else, that’s all. Nothing else is going to change. We’ll be best friends forever, you’ll see.’

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