Don’t Say a Word

Dan again: ‘Look, if it’s too much bother –’

‘It’s not too much bother, I just don’t know if I can get a child minder set up before Friday. I’ve never left Josh with anyone before. I have to be sure.’

‘I know. I was going to say: if it’s too much bother sorting out childcare, I’ll just come over to yours with some wine and Ribena. Or just Ribena.’

‘Oh, you know how to treat a girl! All that money you’re earning on Rhea Stevens?’

A pause. Have I offended him?

‘Actually, I’m doing the Rhea case pretty much pro bono.’

‘What? You’re doing it for free? How come?’

‘Goodness of my heart?’

‘But I don’t understand. Why aren’t you using Legal Aid – surely the firm is?’

‘Tim talked me into it,’ Dan tells me. ‘Joking aside, he can be pretty persuasive.’

‘Jesus. But it must take up your time. How can you afford it?’

‘By offering women Ribena,’ Dan counters. ‘Come on, how about it – if you have childcare we’ll go out, otherwise I’ll come to you.’

‘It’s a date.’

‘Finally.’

We both take a beat. Yes, finally.

‘OK, well I’ll see you then,’ I say. ‘Text me your mobile number; this one’s blocked.’

‘Will do,’ he says. ‘Just let me know what works for you.’

‘Great,’ I tell him.

We end the call.

Wow. So. A date. Have I ever even been on a bona fide date?

Mick didn’t count.

Mick picked me up from the trash.

Literally.

And I don’t count the ensuing cup of tea in the caff as a date. I certainly hadn’t shaved my legs.

But before that, I need to look into childcare. I’d rather not have to introduce Dan and Josh just yet. They do that later on, in the films, those yoga-fit airbrushed mums (yes, I’ve seen the Hollywood version of my life. Doesn’t it all just turn up roses?). Date five or something, you go to a picnic by a lake and everyone falls in and it’s really funny. You’re not meant to introduce your kids to every man you meet or they’re weighing them up as a potential dad. Which is particularly unfair when your kid doesn’t know his real dad. Thinks he’s dead.

I pull out my blackberry. I’m about to message Tim about the child minder details. But I see they’re already there.

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