The Ballad of Reading Gaol

Oscar Wilde

The Ballad of Reading Gaol

Version One

I

               He did not wear his scarlet coat,                 For blood and wine are red,               And blood and wine were on his hands                 When they found him with the dead,               The poor dead woman whom he loved,                 And murdered in her bed.               He walked amongst the Trial Men                 In a suit of shabby grey;               A cricket cap was on his head,                 And his step seemed light and gay;               But I never saw a man who looked                 So wistfully at the day.               I never saw a man who looked                 With such a wistful eye               Upon that little tent of blue                 Which prisoners call the sky,               And at every drifting cloud that went                 With sails of silver by.               I walked, with other souls in pain,                 Within another ring,               And was wondering if the man had done                 A great or little thing,               When a voice behind me whispered low,                 "That fellow's got to swing."               Dear Christ! the very prison walls                 Suddenly seemed to reel,               And the sky above my head became                 Like a casque of scorching steel;               And, though I was a soul in pain,                 My pain I could not feel.               I only knew what hunted thought                 Quickened his step, and why               He looked upon the garish day                 With such a wistful eye;               The man had killed the thing he loved                 And so he had to die.               Yet each man kills the thing he loves                 By each let this be heard,               Some do it with a bitter look,                 Some with a flattering word,               The coward does it with a kiss,                 The brave man with a sword!               Some kill their love when they are young,                 And some when they are old;               Some strangle with the hands of Lust,                 Some with the hands of Gold:               The kindest use a knife, because                 The dead so soon grow cold.               Some love too little, some too long,                 Some sell, and others buy;               Some do the deed with many tears,                 And some without a sigh:               For each man kills the thing he loves,                 Yet each man does not die.               He does not die a death of shame                 On a day of dark disgrace,               Nor have a noose about his neck,                 Nor a cloth upon his face,               Nor drop feet foremost through the floor                 Into an empty place               He does not sit with silent men                 Who watch him night and day;               Who watch him when he tries to weep,                 And when he tries to pray;               Who watch him lest himself should rob                 The prison of its prey.               He does not wake at dawn to see                 Dread figures throng his room,               The shivering Chaplain robed in white,                 The Sheriff stern with gloom,               And the Governor all in shiny black,                 With the yellow face of Doom.               He does not rise in piteous haste                 To put on convict-clothes,               While some coarse-mouthed Doctor gloats, and notes                 Each new and nerve-twitched pose,               Fingering a watch whose little ticks                 Are like horrible hammer-blows.               He does not know that sickening thirst                 That sands one's throat, before               The hangman with his gardener's gloves                 Slips through the padded door,               And binds one with three leathern thongs,                 That the throat may thirst no more.               He does not bend his head to hear                 The Burial Office read,               Nor, while the terror of his soul                 Tells him he is not dead,               Cross his own coffin, as he moves                 Into the hideous shed.               He does not stare upon the air                 Through a little roof of glass;               He does not pray with lips of clay                 For his agony to pass;               Nor feel upon his shuddering cheek                 The kiss of Caiaphas.

II

               Six weeks our guardsman walked the yard,                 In a suit of shabby grey:               His cricket cap was on his head,                 And his step seemed light and gay,               But I never saw a man who looked                 So wistfully at the day.               I never saw a man who looked                 With such a wistful eye               Upon that little tent of blue                 Which prisoners call the sky,               And at every wandering cloud that trailed                 Its raveled fleeces by.               He did not wring his hands, as do                 Those witless men who dare               To try to rear the changeling Hope                 In the cave of black Despair:               He only looked upon the sun,                 And drank the morning air.               He did not wring his hands nor weep,                 Nor did he peek or pine,               But he drank the air as though it held                 Some healthful anodyne;               With open mouth he drank the sun                 As though it had been wine!               And I and all the souls in pain,                 Who tramped the other ring,               Forgot if we ourselves had done                 A great or little thing,               And watched with gaze of dull amaze                 The man who had to swing.               And strange it was to see him pass                 With a step so light and gay,               And strange it was to see him look                 So wistfully at the day,               And strange it was to think that he                 Had such a debt to pay.               For oak and elm have pleasant leaves                 That in the spring-time shoot:               But grim to see is the gallows-tree,                 With its adder-bitten root,               And, green or dry, a man must die                 Before it bears its fruit!               The loftiest place is that seat of grace                 For which all worldlings try:               But who would stand in hempen band                 Upon a scaffold high,               And through a murderer's collar take                 His last look at the sky?               It is sweet to dance to violins                 When Love and Life are fair:               To dance to flutes, to dance to lutes                 Is delicate and rare:               But it is not sweet with nimble feet                 To dance upon the air!               So with curious eyes and sick surmise                 We watched him day by day,               And wondered if each one of us                 Would end the self-same way,               For none can tell to what red Hell                 His sightless soul may stray.               At last the dead man walked no more                 Amongst the Trial Men,               And I knew that he was standing up                 In the black dock's dreadful pen,               And that never would I see his face                 In God's sweet world again.               Like two doomed ships that pass in storm                 We had crossed each other's way:               But we made no sign, we said no word,                 We had no word to say;               For we did not meet in the holy night,                 But in the shameful day.               A prison wall was round us both,                 Two outcast men were we:               The world had thrust us from its heart,                 And God from out His care:               And the iron gin that waits for Sin                 Had caught us in its snare.               In Debtors' Yard the stones are hard,                 And the dripping wall is high,               So it was there he took the air                 Beneath the leaden sky,               And by each side a Warder walked,                 For fear the man might die.               Or else he sat with those who watched                 His anguish night and day;               Who watched him when he rose to weep,                 And when he crouched to pray;               Who watched him lest himself should rob                 Their scaffold of its prey.               The Governor was strong upon                 The Regulations Act:               The Doctor said that Death was but                 A scientific fact:               And twice a day the Chaplain called                 And left a little tract.               And twice a day he smoked his pipe,                 And drank his quart of beer:               His soul was resolute, and held                 No hiding-place for fear;               He often said that he was glad                 The hangman's hands were near.               But why he said so strange a thing                 No Warder dared to ask:               For he to whom a watcher's doom                 Is given as his task,               Must set a lock upon his lips,                 And make his face a mask.               Or else he might be moved, and try                 To comfort or console:               And what should Human Pity do                 Pent up in Murderers' Hole?               What word of grace in such a place                 Could help a brother's soul?               With slouch and swing around the ring                 We trod the Fool's Parade!               We did not care: we knew we were                 The Devil's Own Brigade:               And shaven head and feet of lead                 Make a merry masquerade.               We tore the tarry rope to shreds                 With blunt and bleeding nails;               We rubbed the doors, and scrubbed the floors,                 And cleaned the shining rails:               And, rank by rank, we soaped the plank,                 And clattered with the pails.               We sewed the sacks, we broke the stones,                 We turned the dusty drill:               We banged the tins, and bawled the hymns,                 And sweated on the mill:               But in the heart of every man                 Terror was lying still.               So still it lay that every day                 Crawled like a weed-clogged wave:               And we forgot the bitter lot                 That waits for fool and knave,               Till once, as we tramped in from work,                 We passed an open grave.               With yawning mouth the yellow hole                 Gaped for a living thing;               The very mud cried out for blood                 To the thirsty asphalte ring:               And we knew that ere one dawn grew fair                 Some prisoner had to swing.               Right in we went, with soul intent                 On Death and Dread and Doom:               The hangman, with his little bag,                 Went shuffling through the gloom               And each man trembled as he crept                 Into his numbered tomb.               That night the empty corridors                 Were full of forms of Fear,               And up and down the iron town                 Stole feet we could not hear,               And through the bars that hide the stars                 White faces seemed to peer.               He lay as one who lies and dreams                 In a pleasant meadow-land,               The watcher watched him as he slept,                 And could not understand               How one could sleep so sweet a sleep                 With a hangman close at hand?               But there is no sleep when men must weep                 Who never yet have wept:               So we – the fool, the fraud, the knave —                 That endless vigil kept,               And through each brain on hands of pain                 Another's terror crept.               Alas! it is a fearful thing                 To feel another's guilt!               For, right within, the sword of Sin                 Pierced to its poisoned hilt,               And as molten lead were the tears we shed                 For the blood we had not spilt.               The Warders with their shoes of felt                 Crept by each padlocked door,               And peeped and saw, with eyes of awe,                 Grey figures on the floor,               And wondered why men knelt to pray                 Who never prayed before.               All through the night we knelt and prayed,                 Mad mourners of a corpse!               The troubled plumes of midnight were                 The plumes upon a hearse:               And bitter wine upon a sponge                 Was the savior of Remorse.               The cock crew, the red cock crew,                 But never came the day:               And crooked shape of Terror crouched,                 In the corners where we lay:               And each evil sprite that walks by night                 Before us seemed to play.               They glided past, they glided fast,                 Like travelers through a mist:               They mocked the moon in a rigadoon                 Of delicate turn and twist,               And with formal pace and loathsome grace                 The phantoms kept their tryst.               With mop and mow, we saw them go,                 Slim shadows hand in hand:               About, about, in ghostly rout                 They trod a saraband:               And the damned grotesques made arabesques,                 Like the wind upon the sand!               With the pirouettes of marionettes,                 They tripped on pointed tread:               But with flutes of Fear they filled the ear,                 As their grisly masque they led,               And loud they sang, and loud they sang,                 For they sang to wake the dead.               "Oho!" they cried, "The world is wide,                 But fettered limbs go lame!               And once, or twice, to throw the dice                 Is a gentlemanly game,               But he does not win who plays with Sin                 In the secret House of Shame."

III

   No things of air these antics were                 That frolicked with such glee:               To men whose lives were held in gyves,                 And whose feet might not go free,               Ah! wounds of Christ! they were living things,                 Most terrible to see.               Around, around, they waltzed and wound;                 Some wheeled in smirking pairs:               With the mincing step of demirep                 Some sidled up the stairs:               And with subtle sneer, and fawning leer,                 Each helped us at our prayers.               The morning wind began to moan,                 But still the night went on:               Through its giant loom the web of gloom                 Crept till each thread was spun:               And, as we prayed, we grew afraid                 Of the Justice of the Sun.               The moaning wind went wandering round                 The weeping prison-wall:               Till like a wheel of turning-steel                 We felt the minutes crawl:

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