Trust In Tomorrow

‘Where do you think you’re going?’

She turned guiltily, in the act of picking up her suitcase in preparation to leave, finding Lucas watching her from the doorway of the room he had disappeared into minutes earlier. ‘I thought I’d go back to the airport,’ she told him truthfully. ‘And get the next flight home.’

His expression was darkly forbidding as he came back into the lounge. ‘When you know Jace wants you to stay here?’

Her eyes widened. ‘He did contact you?’

‘Yes,’ Lucas nodded, adding nothing to the confirmation.

‘What did he say?’ she prompted impatiently.

‘Only what you’ve already told me,’ he dismissed. ‘He’s going to telephone me once you’ve arrived. But he’s already told me enough for me to realise this will be the best place for you for the next few weeks, at least,’ he added grimly.

‘I could have handled the publicity if Jace had given me the chance!’

‘He wanted to spare you any unnecessary pain.’

‘I’m sure he didn’t tell you all that in a cable,’ she derided defensively.

‘You’re right, he didn’t,’ Lucas bit out curtly. ‘I know him well enough to be certain he would want to protect you at all costs.’

Chelsea was sure he was right, but she didn’t know how he could make such a claim about a man he hadn’t seen for so many years. ‘Jace may have changed since you last saw him——’

‘He hasn’t.’

‘Seven years is a long time.’

‘I last met Jace in Los Angeles two weeks ago,’ Lucas told her flatly.

Her brows rose as she couldn’t hide her surprise. ‘I didn’t know that …’

Lucas shrugged. ‘You live with your mother, so how could you possibly be aware of all your father’s friends?’

Mainly because Jace had told her about most of them, although the remark Lucas had made about her living with her mother was what cast the shadow over her face. She had lived with her mother, she had no idea where she lived now, although it seemed that for the moment it was here, with this darkly handsome man who was a complete stranger to her!

‘You’re right,’ she acknowledged dully. ‘But that friendship doesn’t extend to me, and I would rather go back home.’

‘You’re wrong, Chelsea.’ He shook his head, a hint of gentleness to the forbidding mouth. ‘Even if I didn’t at first remember you as the silver-haired angel who dogged my footsteps seven years ago I do remember you now, and I insist that you stay here.’

And she doubted many people resisted when this man insisted, and she was too weary to do so herself right now. ‘You thought I was a hooker,’ she reminded softly.

A dull red hue darkened his face beneath the prominent cheekbones. ‘I’m sorry about that——’

‘I’m not,’ She shook her head, smiling wanly at his puzzled frown. ‘Once I’m a little less tired, a little less numb, I’d like to think there’s something we can sit down and laugh about together.’

Lucas looked as if he would rather forget about the whole incident than laugh about it, concentrating on the first thing she had said. ‘The spare room is already made up, if you would like to go and lie down for a while?’

‘You’re sure I’m not going to inconvenience you?’ she still hesitated.

‘I’m sure,’ he nodded.

‘I meant with—a special friend, or someone,’ she lamely tried to explain what she had meant; Lucas didn’t come across as the sort of man that had girlfriends, although she was sure he had spent the past weekend with the current woman in his life. She vaguely wondered how serious the relationship was.

His mouth tightened disapprovingly. ‘With no one,’ he bit out. ‘I’ll show you your bedroom.’

Chelsea followed him with a slight grimace on her face; obviously she had touched on a delicate subject as far as this man was concerned. Maybe he just didn’t like having to admit to the more basic urges and feelings that plagued the lives of other mortals!

Making rash judgments about her host wasn’t going to make her stay here any easier! For all she knew Lucas could be very warm and loving to the woman he favoured with his attentions—She was doing it again! And she was too tired at the moment to make rational judgments about anything, especially this man; Jace had sent her here, so he must trust and like the other man. So would she.

‘Camilla chose the decor in this room herself,’ Lucas told her as he showed her into what was obviously his guest room, the pale lemon and brown colour scheme restful as well as being comfortably feminine; there was nothing Chelsea disliked more than a lot of frills and lace in a bedroom, having been pretty much a tomboy until she left school last year, still preferring to wear denims and tops when she wasn’t at work. ‘As my only female guest to date,’ Lucas added pointedly.

She doubted that any female guest he had, other than family, would sleep in a separate bedroom to him anyway; he was much too old and experienced to settle for a platonic relationship. ‘Camilla always did have good taste.’ She ignored his last remark, although her normally effervescent nature wouldn’t usually have let it go unchallenged. ‘It’s a lovely room.’

He nodded abruptly, putting her suitcase down on top of one of the single beds, uncaring of its dampness on the lemon coverlet. ‘I hope you’ll be comfortable. You have your own bathroom through here.’ He opened a connecting door, the decor in there similar to the bedroom. ‘Dinner will be in half an hour, if you would like something on a tray …?’ he raised dark brows.

She shook her head. ‘I’m not hungry. But I can cook you something, if you like?’

‘That won’t be necessary,’ he dismissed arrogantly.

‘I’d enjoy doing it.’

‘I can get my own meals when necessary, although I have a housekeeper who usually leaves my evening meal for me. She’ll be back at work from seven-thirty in the morning, and she doesn’t leave until four. She’s had the weekend off in my own absence,’ he explained.

She should have known he didn’t keep this huge apartment spotlessly clean himself; he hardly came over as the domesticated type. ‘I can help her out, if that’s okay?’

‘Mrs Harvey would probably leave if you tried. And as she’s been with me the last five years I wouldn’t thank you for that,’ he warned.

She could well imagine. ‘I just thought that as well as being helpful it would give me something to do.’ She shrugged. ‘But if you say no …’

‘I say no,’ his mouth twisted. ‘Good domestic help is hard to come by nowadays.’

He wasn’t being patronising, merely stating a fact. Nevertheless, Chelsea wondered if the awesome-sounding Mrs Harvey viewed herself as ‘domestic help’. She knew that their own maid, Clare, would have been most insulted by the title. Her face shadowed. Poor Clare, she had been as devastated by Gloria’s death as everyone else; the elderly woman would probably never recover from the shock.

Lucas frowned as he watched the expressions flickering across her candid face. ‘I’m not so sure you don’t need food more than rest.’

And from the sound of it he personally intended seeing that she got it! But even the thought of food still made her feel ill, although she wasn’t sure she had the strength to fight this formidable man right now. She was saved the trouble of finding the energy to try as the telephone began ringing somewhere in the apartment.

‘I’ll go and answer that,’ he said somewhat impatiently.

‘I’ll probably have fallen asleep by the time you’ve finished with the call,’ she told him hastily, in no mood to have food forced on her.

‘Chelsea, I——’ He broke off irritably as the telephone continued to ring shrilly, seeming to become more and more insistent the more he tried to ignore it. ‘I’ll have to go,’ he strode to the door. ‘If you need anything——’

‘I’ll find you,’ she nodded.

Lucas gave her a hesitant look before leaving the room to answer the telephone, the melodious sound of his voice muffled through the apartment walls.

Chelsea sat down heavily on the single bed next to her now that she was alone, the weight of her mother’s death forcing her down, both mentally and physically. She would never, ever, forget finding her beautiful mother lying so peacefully in her bed she seemed to be only sleeping, her silver-gold hair spread out across her pillow as if brushed there, the blue of the silky nightgown she wore a perfect match for the eyes beneath the long, fanned-out lashes, her make-up perfect, her mouth seeming to be curved into a smile, almost a secretive smile, as if something pleased her even as she lay there.

But that serene beauty had been disturbed from the moment Chelsea had contacted the emergency services. Her mother had no longer looked peaceful or beautiful as they tried to revive life where it had decided it no longer wished to be.

And it had all been her fault. If she hadn’t decided to go bowling straight from work instead of going home as she had planned to do her mother might still be alive now, she might have been able to get the help soon enough to be of some good to her mother. It hadn’t seemed so strange when she received no reply at home when she called to tell her mother of her delay; since the two of them had lived alone they had lived pretty independent lives, both of them busy with new careers. She had simply assumed her mother had gone out to an early supper, her job as a realtor often keeping her late with prospective clients. She hadn’t dreamt, hadn’t guessed, the real reason her mother had been unable to come to the telephone. To come home and find her like that had shaken Chelsea to the core. She doubted she would ever get over not being there when her mother needed her the most. She knew with certainty that the guilt would always be with her.

CHAPTER TWO

THE shower she had taken had refreshed her a little, and although she still didn’t feel like eating, the thought of another cup of coffee—her staple diet of the last few days—seemed like a good idea.

She could still hear Lucas on the telephone as she stepped out into the hallway, it hadn’t seemed worth the bother of dressing again so soon after undressing. Besides, the black towelling robe she wore was adequate clothing for the brief time she needed to leave her room.

‘—you know I’ve enjoyed the last few days,’ Lucas was saying impatiently as she tried to pass through the lounge unnoticed. ‘All right, a very enjoyable time,’ he added huskily after a brief pause. ‘But I’ve already explained to you, several times, that I can’t possibly go out and leave Chelsea alone tonight.’

She had come to an abrupt halt at the sound of her name, blatantly listening to the rest of the conversation. If Lucas thought he had to baby-sit her he was mistaken!

‘God, Jennifer, you’re a mature woman of thirty-two, what attraction do you think a nineteen-year-old girl would hold for me?’ he answered the woman on the telephone exasperatedly.

Chelsea knew half-a-dozen men of his age, a couple of work colleagues, and some friends of her father, who definitely didn’t think of her as a girl!

Lucas seemed to become aware of her indignation emanating across the room at that moment, turning from his sightless gazing out of the window, his mouth tightening disapprovingly as he took in her appearance, her damp hair, the black robe, her bare legs and feet. ‘I’ll call you back, Jennifer,’ he spoke woodenly into the mouthpiece, his gaze still locked icily on Chelsea. ‘No, I’m not being difficult,’ he sighed as the woman obviously objected. ‘I’ll just have to call you back.’ He put down the receiver without waiting for a reply.

Chelsea braced her shoulders as if ready for battle as she and Lucas faced each other across the room. ‘I was just on my way to the kitchen to get some coffee,’ she told him defensively.

Lucas shrugged. ‘Feel free to help yourself to anything you want while you’re staying here,’ he invited.

He was waiting for something else, and they both knew it. ‘You don’t have to alter your plans because of me,’ she said huskily. ‘If you intended going out tonight then please do so, I’m just going to fall into bed and go to sleep anyway.’

He shook his head. ‘My plans to see Jennifer were not definite ones.’

‘But you’ve just spent the last few days with her, haven’t you?’ Chelsea frowned at his casual dismissal of the other woman.

His mouth tightened. ‘Chelsea——’

‘Sorry.’ She held her hands up in apology. ‘Please forget I said that, it’s really none of my business. But she does sound like a good friend, and I certainly don’t need the company.’

The brown eyes narrowed in surprise. ‘Are you dismissing me?’

She flushed. ‘No, I—Yes, perhaps I am,’ she conceded ruefully. ‘Although I didn’t mean to. But when I asked if I would be making things awkward for you by staying here you said no,’ she reminded softly.

‘And you aren’t. Jennifer has been a friend of mine for some time, but she has no claims on me, as I have none on her. I certainly don’t have to justify my actions to her, or to anyone else,’ he stated arrogantly.

She was sure he didn’t either. Although the fact that the woman Jennifer had been a ‘friend’ for some time looked as if she didn’t normally mind that. ‘I’d really rather you kept your dinner date,’ she told him huskily. ‘I’m not going to be any company at all, feeling as tired as I do.’

He seemed to hesitate, finally shrugging agreement. ‘Maybe you’re right.’

‘I know I am.’ She nodded, relieved that she hadn’t had to try too hard to persuade him to go out. The last thing she needed was this complete stranger hovering over her.

He nodded. ‘I’ll leave the telephone number on the pad where I can be reached if you should need me.’

‘I’m not a child, Lucas,’ she told him stiffly.

His cold gaze raked over her from head to foot. ‘I can see that,’ he grated. ‘But you have had a severe shock, and——’

‘And I’m not likely to run around the apartment shrieking hysterically,’ she taunted. ‘The doctor gave me some pills,’ she sighed. ‘Maybe I’ll take a couple.’

Lucas frowned. ‘What sort of pills?’

She shrugged. ‘Just something to relax me.’

‘Tranquilisers?’ his frown deepened.

‘I guess,’ she nodded, wondering what all the fuss was about now.

‘I don’t like the idea of leaving you here under the influence of drugs.’

Angry colour flamed in her cheeks. ‘So now I’m a drug addict?’ she demanded in an exasperated voice. ‘First I’m a hooker, and now I’m a drug-addict!’

Lucas’s mouth tightened. ‘I wasn’t——’

‘Two prescribed pills do not make me an addict!’ Her voice rose shrilly as she finally began to crack under the strain. ‘I just need something to relax me a little. God, my mother only died three days ago!’

‘I know, Chelsea. I know.’ He walked over to clasp her shoulders, looking down at her with sympathetic eyes. ‘But I think a brandy might have the same effect.’

‘Aren’t you frightened I might become an alcoholic?’ she asked tautly.

His face darkened. ‘Chelsea——’

‘I just want to go to sleep, can’t you understand that?’ Tears blinded her as she looked up at him. ‘I need to sleep. That way I don’t have to remember,’ her voice broke.

Lucas’s hands tightened painfully on her shoulders before he pulled her firmly into his arms, cradling her body against the firmness of his. ‘I’m sorry.’ He stroked her silvery hair. ‘I think this has all been more of a shock to me than I realised.’

She bent her head back to look at him. ‘You?’ she frowned, blinking back the tears, unable to see this man as anything but completely controlled.

‘I cared for your mother too,’ he bit out tautly.

Her mouth twisted. ‘Don’t tell me you were seeing her secretly, too?’

Lucas released her abruptly, stepping back. ‘None of my visits to Jace were made in secret. And I hadn’t seen your mother for several years, to answer your question. Although that doesn’t mean I can’t feel saddened by her death.’

It was a verbal rebuke, and yet Chelsea couldn’t apologise for what she had said. It wasn’t like Jace not to tell her things, and he hadn’t mentioned Lucas McAdams since they left England seven years ago.

She nodded abruptly. ‘I’ll just get my coffee and go back to my room.’

‘Chelsea …’

Her face was expressionless as she looked at him. ‘Yes?’

Whatever he had been about to say he changed his mind, his mouth firming into a thin line as his gaze raked over her mercilessly. ‘If we’re going to be living in close proximity for some time then I suggest we establish a few ground rules,’ he told her tautly.

She stiffened expectantly. ‘Yes?’

‘In the first place I would suggest that we respect each other’s privacy.’

Colour heightened her cheeks at the rebuke. ‘And secondly?’ she prompted abruptly.

‘Secondly, I would appreciate your wearing a little more than you have on now outside the privacy of your bedroom,’ he bit out harshly.

The colour deepened in her cheeks, making her look very young. ‘I’m perfectly respectable,’ she defended.

‘I didn’t say you weren’t,’ he dismissed. ‘And you are far from the first woman I’ve seen partially, or indeed fully, unclothed. I just happen to think it would make things a little more—acceptable.’

‘To whom?’

‘To anyone who cares to be interested,’ he came back irritably.

She was too tired to remind him that only minutes ago he had claimed that he didn’t have to justify his actions to anyone; it was his apartment, he had the right to make any rules about their living together that he cared to. ‘I can accept that,’ she shrugged, sure this man was too ‘proper’ to leave his own bedroom without sufficient clothing, even when he was alone here. It seemed incredible that he was the man she had found so exciting in her pre-teen years; he now appeared too staid and respectable for such an interest, despite his good looks.

‘Good,’ he bit out. ‘Then I suggest you get your coffee and go to bed.’

She hadn’t been spoken to in this condescending manner since she was a child—if then! Her parents had always treated her like a person in her own right, even to the extent of fully examining her feelings on the subject before they decided to get a divorce. Lucas treated her as if she didn’t have a brain of her own.

Nevertheless, she made no demur, too tired and worn at this moment to argue her maturity. When the shock of her mother’s death receded a little it would be a different matter!

Lucas had gone from the lounge when she returned from the kitchen, and she could only assume he had gone to his own room to prepare for his date with Jennifer. She couldn’t help wondering about the other woman. A mature woman of thirty-two, Lucas had called her on the telephone. Was that all he wanted in his arms, maturity? Chelsea didn’t doubt Jennifer would be beautiful, and that she would also be sophisticated enough to conduct an affair with Lucas, because the relationship was obviously a physical one. But would she be nice, warm, or would she possess that remoteness that made Lucas so alien to those about him, made him seem removed? Probably the two of them would never meet, although Jennifer sounded as if she would like to see her.

‘I forgot to give you the brandy——’ Lucas broke off awkwardly as he entered her bedroom without knocking, his mouth tightening disapprovingly as her unbelted robe showed she wore nothing beneath it. ‘I’m sorry,’ he said abruptly. ‘I had no idea … I thought you would be in bed,’ he rasped, his jaw rigid.

‘I just cleaned my teeth.’ She handled the situation so much more calmly than he, retying the belt on her robe with hands that shook only slightly. And that wasn’t just because for a moment, a very brief moment, she had seen acknowledgment of her as a woman in the dark brown depths of his eyes; his own appearance was much more devastating. The black evening suit and snowy white shirt made him appear taller and broader than ever, and so handsome he took her breath away.

‘I see,’ he harshly acknowledged her statement. ‘I forgot to give you the brandy.’ He held up a glass with about an inch measure in it. ‘This should help you sleep.’

Her eyes widened. ‘That much should knock me out!’ she derided. ‘Believe it or not, I rarely, if ever, touch alcohol.’

His expression darkened. ‘Chelsea——’

‘Thank you for the brandy,’ she hastily interrupted the reprimand she had invited by her mockery. ‘I’ll drink it in a moment.’

‘You haven’t taken the tablets yet?’

Her mouth tightened; did he think she was completely stupid! ‘No.’

‘Good,’ he nodded curtly, holding out the glass to her with a long, lean hand.

Chelsea took it with unsteady fingers, feeling angered by this further display of arrogant authority, wishing Jace had never sent her here, although understanding the reason that he had. But that didn’t make Lucas’s behaviour any easier to bear. ‘Thanks,’ she told him abruptly. ‘And I think perhaps we ought to establish another ground rule.’ Her head was back defiantly, ‘I won’t walk into your bedroom without first knocking if you won’t walk into mine.’

A dark hue coloured his lean cheeks. ‘I wasn’t thinking when I did that, it won’t happen again.’

She instantly felt contrite for being rude when he had offered her his hospitality. ‘I’m sorry,’ she sighed. ‘It seems Jace has put us both in an awkward position by imposing on you in this way.’

‘When you’re family it isn’t an imposition,’ he replied in a preoccupied voice.

‘Family …?’ she frowned. ‘I would hardly say your friendship with Jace makes me that.’

Lucas straightened, nothing preoccupied about him now. ‘I’ve known you almost from the moment you were born, I feel like your uncle,’ he dismissed abruptly.

‘Feeling like one and actually being one are two different things,’ she snapped, chagrined that he still continued to treat her like a child. He had a shock coming to him when she was feeling more like herself; she didn’t always wear the casually youthful clothing she had arrived in, could be sophisticated herself when she needed to be, or wanted to be. And Lucas’s attitude was making her want to be more and more.

Lucas’s expression was guarded as he looked at her. ‘Nevertheless, that’s what I feel like,’ he insisted coldly. ‘Are you sure you’re going to be all right while I’m out?’ he abruptly closed the subject.

‘I’ll be fine,’ she nodded.

‘I won’t be too late,’ he told her as he walked to the door, the gold cufflinks gleaming brightly at his wrists as his hand came up to open it.

‘Don’t hurry back on my account,’ she shrugged.

‘I won’t,’ he snapped.

Chelsea sighed as he took offence at her words. ‘Lucas …’

‘Yes?’ his eyes were narrowed.

‘I—I—Oh God!’ Her control finally crumpled, her legs giving out weakly beneath her as she fell to the carpeted floor, her face buried in her hands as tears streamed down her cheeks.

She tried to resist the strong arms that pulled her to her feet, but Lucas was remorseless in his intent, holding her tightly against the hardness of his chest as deep shudders wracked her body as she continued to cry. She cried until she had no more tears left to cry, loud agonised sobs as the pain of losing her mother ripped through her. And as she cried Lucas just continued to hold her, not saying a single word, just supporting her in his strong arms.

‘I’m sorry,’ she gulped at last, raising her head to see with dismay the huge damp patch she had made on his jacket and shirt, the black bow-tie at his throat looking slightly limp too. ‘Oh God, look what I’ve done,’ she groaned, brushing down the damp material.

‘Leave it,’ Lucas instructed curtly.

‘But I’ve messed up your——’

‘I said leave it, Chelsea.’ He grasped her arms, holding her in front of him. ‘Do you think I care about being slightly damp?’

A wan smile twisted her mouth. ‘A lot damp,’ she corrected.

‘It doesn’t matter,’ he dismissed. ‘I have other suits.’

‘That isn’t the point——’

‘I agree,’ he bit out tightly. ‘It isn’t.’ He held her gaze with steady intensity.