A Love Against All Odds

‘It’s a new year,’ Maia said in reply. ‘And my resolution was to look to the future and be happy with what I have.’ Todd might not have been her first love but he would be a good husband. He was loyal, trustworthy, dependable and he adored her.

But, if she’d known the future was going to bring Henry back into her life, would she have made a different choice? It was too late to ask that question.

‘Besides,’ she continued, ‘everything is booked—the cathedral, the reception venue, the cake, the photographer and the hairdresser.’

‘It can always be un-booked.’

Maia wasn’t so sure. ‘We posted the invitations yesterday.’

The wedding was six weeks away. The sun kept rising and setting, the days kept turning over, and suddenly she was near the end of her engagement. This was it.

Maia closed her eyes as she started another song. It was one of her favourites, made famous by Ella Fitzgerald. She left the microphone fixed into the stand but steadied it with one hand as she swayed in time with the music. She’d chosen to wear a long, black dress tonight and it brushed her calves and ankles as she moved. It was cut low in the front and hugged her curves but a split up one leg to her thigh allowed for movement. Sequins scattered over the dress caught the light. There were more than a few men in the bar who were watching her with interest but, for the moment, she was oblivious to the attention as she let her mind drift.

Tonight the band was performing in the piano bar of the Cathedral Square Hotel in the city centre. This had become a semi-regular gig for her and the band. There were five of them tonight: the pianist, the bass player, the drummer, the trumpeter and her. The band had a different repertoire for the nights when she was unavailable due to nursing shifts and on those nights the pianist became the lead singer.

A spotlight was focused on her but she wasn’t aware of it. When she sang she wasn’t aware of anything except the music and the lyrics. It was one of the things she loved about singing. It transported her to another world where she wasn’t thinking about work or weddings or loss.

The spotlight highlighted Maia’s exotic features. Her English and Maori heritage had blended together, giving her the best of both worlds. Her shape and colouring was courtesy of her Maori background on both sides of her family. Her round face, round cheeks, generous bust and generous hips, along with her masses of thick dark hair and brown eyes, were definitely Maori, as was her skin, with its hint of coffee. Her facial features were the image of her half-English mother, with the same almond-shaped dark eyes, finely arched brows and narrow nose.

She’d done her make-up tonight to suit the atmosphere of the piano bar. She’d painted her lips red and gone with dark, smoky eyes. She wasn’t normally much of a make-up wearer—she was far too lazy to bother most days and she never wore make-up to work—but she made an exception on the nights when she performed with the band. She enjoyed the chance to get dressed up and performing on stage was all about playing a role and she was determined to do her part justice.

Tonight’s performance was going smoothly. The crowd was reasonable; their first set had been well received and the applause was reassuring. Some nights Maia felt invisible on stage despite the spotlight.

She was pleased to have this gig tonight; it meant less time to think about Henry’s reappearance. Despite her reassurances to Carrie, Henry’s return had unsettled her more than she was prepared to admit. She had been twenty-two when they’d met, he’d been her first love and it seemed that neither her head nor her heart had forgotten him. But in a day or two she was sure she’d be fine. In a day or two she would have recovered from the shock of seeing him again.

She was halfway through a song, her eyes still closed, when she felt an odd stirring in the air as if someone had opened a window and let a breeze in. The breeze floated past her, caressing her skin and whispering in her ear. She opened her eyes and looked out into the crowd.

He stood by the bar on the far side of the room, watching her.

She watched him back. There weren’t many things that could distract Maia when she was singing, but there was always one exception to any rule, and she knew this man was it.

He had showered and changed after work and he wore a black business shirt with the sleeves rolled up. Maia’s eyes swept across his chest and followed the line of his arms before drifting down to his narrow hips which were encased in a pair of dark jeans. He had one hand hooked into the pocket of his jeans and in the other he held a glass of beer. He raised the glass towards her in a silent salute. Maia felt the breeze brush over her again and this time it whispered his name.

Henry.

Her breath caught in her throat as their eyes locked and she lost her place in the song. Even at this distance she could see the intensity in his indigo eyes and feel the heat in his gaze. Warmth flooded through her, pooling in her belly, and she couldn’t even begin to try to find the words to continue singing. She had been swaying to the music but now she was worried that her knees were going to give way beneath her. She gripped the microphone stand with both hands as she tried to keep herself upright. She turned her head to look at the pianist, breaking eye contact with Henry in the process. Sean, the pianist, mouthed the words to her and somehow she managed to pick up the pieces and finish the song with a breathless voice and her eyes tightly shut.

As the song wrapped she didn’t give the band a chance to launch into the next one. The moment the music ended, she stepped away from the microphone and said, ‘Can we take a short break, guys?’

‘Is everything all right?’ Sean asked.

Maia nodded. ‘Everything’s fine,’ she lied.

Things were definitely not all right.

She didn’t remember stepping off the stage or walking through the bar but she must have done so because now she was standing in front of Henry.

‘Hello, Maia.’ His British accent caressed her name and Maia’s knees wobbled again. His voice was deep and gentle and his blue eyes were smiling.

Was it only today that he had come back into her life? It felt like he’d never left. It felt like everything that had happened since had been a dream, or perhaps she was dreaming now.

He took her hands and kissed her on the cheek. They were not in the hospital now; there were no concerns about protocol. She closed her eyes and held her breath as her limbs turned to liquid. This was definitely not a dream.

Her heart raced as his lips imprinted on her skin. What was it about him that could do this to her? How was it possible that a simple kiss on the cheek could leave her breathless and excited and make her feel as if she could melt away? As if she could dissolve in a pool of desire? One kiss from Henry and she could feel herself unfurling, coming back to life. She thought she had been doing okay but now she realised she’d been surviving, not living. She’d been getting through her days, but the days had had a dullness about them. One kiss from Henry and the colours began to return.

How could he affect her like this after all this time? How could she let him?

She stepped back as annoyance overrode pleasure and guilt replaced desire. She’d forgotten all about Todd. She found it irritating that Henry could return after three years and immediately influence her like this. But she wasn’t sure who she was annoyed with—him or her.

She wouldn’t give in. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing he still set her heart racing. It had taken her years to put her heart back together and she wasn’t going to let one kiss reopen the scar where it had healed.

‘What are you doing here?’ she asked.

‘I was on my way to my room and I thought I heard you singing. I thought I’d check.’

‘You’re staying here?’

He nodded. ‘Just until I can find some decent short-term accommodation close to the hospital.’ He pulled his room card out of his pocket. ‘Have you got time for a drink? My shout.’

She shook her head. ‘I’m working.’

‘Just a quick one, for old times’ sake. We’ve got some catching up to do.’

She looked into his indigo eyes and said, ‘It’s been three years, Henry. That’s a lot of catching up.’

‘Have dinner with me tomorrow, then.’

No. She couldn’t do that, for so many reasons. She didn’t trust herself. Or him. Her best defence was to stay as far away from him as possible, though that would be difficult, given they were working together. But she certainly didn’t have to complicate things further by agreeing to have dinner with him. She glanced back over her shoulder. The stage had been abandoned. The band had taken advantage of her abrupt exit and were taking a break—surely one quick drink couldn’t hurt? ‘One drink.’

There was an empty table beside them. Henry pulled out a chair for her and she sat. It seemed she lacked the willpower to refuse his invitation. No, she admitted, if only to herself, she didn’t lack the will power—she lacked the desire to walk away. She had never been able to resist him.

‘What can I get you? A glass of Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc?’

‘No. I don’t drink wine if I’m singing.’ There was always the risk that her sinuses would become congested. ‘I’ll have a vodka, lime and soda.’

Henry signalled to the waitress and ordered Maia’s drink.

‘How was San Francisco?’ she asked, filling in the silence while she waited for her drink.

‘Interesting. I really liked it.’

‘You didn’t want to stay?’

He shook his head. ‘I left there a year ago. I’ve been in Tokyo for the last twelve months, studying the medical implications and response to tsunamis. It was time to come back and put what I’ve learnt about disaster management into practice.’

The waitress placed Maia’s drink on the table. Condensation settled on the outside of the glass and Maia wiped it off with one finger as she thought about all the things that Henry would have seen and done over the past three years. The diamond in her engagement ring caught the light and Henry’s eye as Maia ran her finger over the glass. He reached for her hand and just the barest touch of his fingers on her skin made her catch her breath. While she was connected to him she felt like she ceased to exist. As if nothing else mattered but the two of them. As if they were one.

She knew he shouldn’t have this effect on her still. Three years was a long time. It should have given her time to forget. Time had moved on. She had moved on. But her body didn’t seem to have received the same message.

His thumb rested in her palm as he turned her hand, and the solitaire diamond sparkled. ‘You’re engaged?’

She nodded. She’d taken it off her necklace and had slipped it back onto her finger as she was getting dressed tonight.

‘Anyone I know?’

‘Not really.’ The rapid beating of her heart made her voice sound breathless.

‘What does that mean?’

‘You saw him today but there was no time to introduce you.’ There’d been no reason to introduce them either but Maia knew she hadn’t wanted to.

‘The paramedic who brought Adam in?’

It seemed he had noticed Todd’s hand on her shoulder. Noticed and remembered. Maia nodded.

‘When is the wedding?’

‘Six weeks.’

Henry sat back in his seat and let go of her hand. She noticed he hadn’t congratulated her. What did that mean?

Probably nothing. She couldn’t afford to read anything into the silence. It wasn’t her place to speculate about his thoughts.

‘Timing was never one of our strong points,’ he said.

She studied his expression but it was difficult to read in the dim lights of the bar. Did he have regrets too?

Maia shook her head. ‘No, it wasn’t.’ His regrets were no longer her concern. They couldn’t be. Her life had changed when her father had died and it was naive to think things could ever go back to the way they were. Their lives hadn’t fitted together three years ago; it was unlikely they would fit together any better now. Nothing he’d said made her think his priorities had changed.

‘So things have worked out well for you?’ he asked. ‘You’re happy?’

‘Of course.’ She was, wasn’t she? She had nothing to be unhappy about. She was healthy, she loved her job, she had family, friends and a fiancé who loved her.

She didn’t want to think about why Todd was last on her list. Was that where he fitted in her life?

She should be happy. There was no reason not to be yet she knew she was lying. If she was happy why was she sitting here imagining what her life would have been like now if Henry had never left? Or if she’d gone with him? But that had never been seriously discussed.

They’d known at the beginning that their relationship would have an end. Henry’s plans had already been in place. He’d been in Christchurch for a limited time, she’d known the date he was leaving and she had known he wouldn’t take her with him. He travelled alone. That was his choice and, while she didn’t like it, she’d had to accept it. Then, just weeks after his departure, her dad had suffered his first stroke and Maia had known then she would have chosen to stay. But it had been tough, really tough, and in the end she had lost both her father and Henry.

‘Things have worked out differently to what I expected but that’s life, isn’t it?’ she said. ‘Things change and you have to change with them.’

She could see the band members making their way back onto the stage. She pushed her chair back and stood. ‘I have to go.’

Henry got up too and came to her side. ‘I’ll see you soon,’ he said as he leant forward and kissed her cheek a second time, making her stomach flutter.

Oh, God, how was she going to handle this? How on earth had she thought she was over him? Just one kiss and she could feel herself falling again. She needed to get out of here.

Somehow Maia managed to get through two more songs. Henry had stayed for both before leaving the room. She doubted he’d return to the piano bar tonight but she didn’t want to hang around to find out. She told the band she wasn’t feeling well and made an early exit. An exit that felt very much like an escape.

The hotel doorman hailed her a taxi and she spent the ride home thinking about Henry. She thought she had managed to put him out of her mind. She would have thought three years was long enough to stop thinking about him and it should have been long enough for her body to forget him. But her reaction tonight proved that wasn’t the case. Her body definitely hadn’t got the message that three years had passed—her body had sprung to life as if it had been dormant these past few years.

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