Burning Secrets

Jesse’s face grew grim and stiff. “I have nothing to say about Paul.”

Throwing her what could only be classified as a disdainful glare, Jesse laid the paper aside, stood, then tossed a few bills on the table. He shouldered past her and walked out the door to the diner.

Chapter 2

Jesse sat in his SUV outside his youngest half sister Emily’s house, his mind focused on Karen Ellis. The woman’s beauty had stirred to life emotions that he hadn’t felt in a very long time, if ever. But he couldn’t allow his testosterone to rule his thinking.

What did she want to know about Paul and why? Had she heard about the suspicious circumstances of Paul’s death? Was she a reporter?

Though this parade of questions drummed at his mind, he knew he had other fish to fry right at the moment. He stared at the sprawling white Victorian house he’d grown up in, debating whether or not to go in. Some potent memories awaited him inside that door. Was he strong enough to come face-to-face with them? Did he even want to?

Still groping for an answer, he glanced up in time to see the front door fly open and his half sister Emily hurry onto the porch. Following her were Rose, Emily’s mother-in-law, who had been the Kingston’s housekeeper for years; Emily’s husband, Kat Madison; and their twin little girls, Cat and Casey. Kat slid his free arm around Emily and pulled her close to his side.

The family picture created the same hollow ache inside Jesse that he’d felt all his life—he was a part of the household, but not the family.

A tap on his side window drew his attention. He turned to find his other half sister, Honey Logan, staring in at him.

“Are you planning on getting out sometime soon? Em has to put the twins to bed before dawn, you know.” A wide smile softened Honey’s words.

Jesse grinned sheepishly, opened the door and stepped out. Before he knew what was happening, her welcoming arms enveloped him. Quickly, he pried himself from her embrace and took a step to the side, the small distance between them doing little to ease the discomfort he’d derived from the emotional welcome.

“How are you, Honey?” He shoved his hands in his pockets.

She stood back, then glanced over her shoulder at a man Jesse hadn’t noticed before, her husband, Matt Logan. “I’m happy, Jesse. Very happy.” Her radiant smile affirmed it. Finally, that was one part of his past he could put to rest. If only the rest would prove that easy.

Jesse shook hands with his newest brother-in-law. “Matt.”

“Jesse. Good to have you home.”

Honey reached for a young boy standing near her and pulled him to her side. “Danny, say hello to your uncle.”

The boy looked exactly like his father. Danny held out his hand to Jesse. “Hi, Uncle Jesse.”

“Hey, Danny.” Jesse shook the small hand.

“Hey, remember us?” Emily called from the porch.

“Would you let us forget?” Honey called back, displaying the usual banter that had been the signature of his half sisters’ relationship all their lives, a relationship from which Jesse had always felt excluded.

They all headed for the porch and more hellos. By the time they were ready to go inside, Jesse still hadn’t been able to shake the strange discomfort he’d gotten from their enthusiastic greetings and his inability to return them. Coming into his sisters’ lives at the age of nine, he’d never been really close to either of them.

Hesitantly, he let Rose lead him into the house. He paused for just a moment on the threshold. Emily’s mother-in-law smiled, patted his arm and urged him forward with a gentle nudge to his back.

“It’s not the same place, Jesse,” Rose told him softly, then added an understanding smile.

The house was nothing like what he remembered from the time Rose had cooked and cleaned for his father. Emily had completely redecorated it with bright colors, ruffled curtains and tons of greenery. Two identical playpens filled with toys and stuffed animals occupied the space where his father’s recliner—the chair Jesse had always referred to as “the throne”—had stood. A golden retriever lazed in a puddle of sunlight near the playpens.

One thing was missing—something that made the most distinct difference, something he’d always associated with this room—his father’s cigarette smoke. This had been the room where Jesse had come face-to-face with his father for the first time, where he’d come frequently to have punishments meted out, where he’d confronted his father over Honey’s impending, disastrous marriage to Stan, her first husband, and where he’d seen his father for the last time. More than anything else, the absence of the smoke that had labeled the room as Frank Kingston’s erased his presence from the house.

“Dawg!” one of the twin girls shouted and pointed, yanking Jesse from the past.

As if on cue, the golden retriever stood, stretched and sauntered over to Jesse, then offered her ears to be scratched. As he obliged, he glanced at his family.

They have it all.

And what did he have? The house next door, a house he hadn’t been inside since long before he’d bought it on a whim to allow Emily to have this one. A family whose love and affection made him want to run. And enough guilt sitting on his shoulders to sink a battleship. Quite a summation of a man’s life.

“Uncle Jesse?”

He roused himself and looked down at his nephew. “Yes, Danny?”

“We’re having a welcome home barbecue for you tomorrow. Mom says so.” The boy made the declaration as if Honey’s word ranked right up there with the Pope’s.

Jesse looked at Honey, who smiled from her place at Matt’s side. Jesse didn’t have the heart to tell her that a family reunion wasn’t high on his to-do list. All he wanted was some time alone to come to terms with the mystery of his best friend’s death.

He laughed uncomfortably, then sobered and cleared his throat of a surprising surge of emotion. “You guys don’t have to do that.”

Emily came forward and touched his arm. “We want to. We missed you.” Then, as if realizing she was causing him discomfort, she stepped back and lightened her tone.

Jesse felt another nudge to his side. Again, it was Danny. “Mom says maybe you can even bring a date, if you want.”

Jesse’s thoughts flew immediately to a pair of brilliant green eyes and hair the color of buttercups at twilight. In a strange way, the image surprised him by easing the tension from his coiled nerves. But it didn’t make the idea of spending an entire day as the center of his family’s attention any easier to swallow.

His expression must have telegraphed his hesitation, and Kat caught it.

“Your sisters have worked all week preparing your favorite foods, so don’t think you can hide out there in the woods.” Kat gestured toward the thick forest bordering the back lawn, where Jesse had taken refuge as a child. “Old Goldie’s got a nose like a bloodhound and can find anyone.” Kat winked at Jesse, making light of the veiled warning not to disappoint his sisters.

Jesse looked around at their smiling faces, still amazed that they’d go to these lengths for him and that they even remembered what foods he liked.

“I guess I’d better show up, then.” Trying to make light of his hesitation, he winked at Kat. “There is one condition. Emily isn’t cooking, is she?”

Emily laughed, then stepped forward and raised her small fist as if she was going to punch him in the arm. Jesse instinctively pulled away. She dropped her hand and then shoved it in her pocket. Looking nervously at her husband, she moved into the circle of his arms. He held her loosely while she glanced back at Jesse.

The expression on Emily’s face, as though she’d run into an invisible brick wall, burned into Jesse’s mind. Was that how his sisters saw him, aloof and untouchable?

The next day, as Karen drove down Bristol’s main street, she inhaled the sweet scent of the flowers blanketing the square. The hum of people hurrying down the street toward the church lent life to the morning ambience of the small town. The sheer peace of the scene seeped into her tired body.

Having overslept and missed the eight o’clock B and B deadline for breakfast, Karen had opted to eat at the Diner. While she’d been eating, she’d asked the waitress for directions to Jesse Kingston’s. The waitress had told her that she was fairly new to the area and had no idea about Jesse’s residence, but she did know where Jesse’s sister Emily lived because she’d been there to buy one of Emily’s golden retriever puppies for her daughter.

With Emily Kingston’s address and directions lying on the passenger’s seat, Karen headed toward the outskirts of town. Passing down tree-lined streets with kids scattered everywhere engaging in a variety of Sunday activities, she touched her flat stomach and allowed the contentment of the place to calm her.

Oddly enough, with the calm came thoughts of Jesse Kingston. What was that bleakness she’d seen in his eyes? Why was a good-looking man like him sitting alone in the local eatery, looking lost and sporting the hair-trigger temper of a bull in heat? And why did she care?

Judging by Jesse’s rude behavior in the diner the day before, he was not going to be terribly forthcoming with information about Paul. But what she didn’t understand was why. Why refuse to talk to her about his best friend? And it hadn’t been just the refusal. The look on his face had almost dared her to push him, but to be ready to suffer the consequences.

Well, whatever his reason, she would not leave Bristol until he answered her questions. She gently caressed her tummy. “Don’t worry, little one. We’ll find your family. I promise.”

About fifteen minutes later, she pulled up to a beautiful old Victorian house. Several cars were parked in the driveway. Too many to belong to the small family the waitress had said Emily had. Not wanting to interrupt what looked like it might be some sort of family gathering, Karen reached for the key to start the car and leave.

“Hi, can I help you?”

Karen started and for a moment could only stare at the blond woman peeking in her open car window. Then as if someone had jabbed her in the ribs, she roused herself.

“Hi. I’m Karen Ellis. I’m looking for Jesse Kingston, and I was told I could find someone here who could tell me where he lives. I need to talk to him on an urgent matter.” She glanced around at the other vehicles. “But I don’t want to interrupt your party. I can come back another time.”

The strikingly lovely woman extended her hand. “I’m Honey Logan, Jesse’s sister. He’ll be here shortly. This is a welcome home party for him. And you’re here now, so why don’t you wait?”

“Oh, I don’t—”

“Please,” Honey said, opening the car door and beckoning for Karen to get out. “No sense in making an extra trip, and if it’s urgent, you’ll be wanting to see him sooner rather than later.”

Karen could have kissed her. “If you’re sure. I don’t want to spoil your party.”

“You won’t spoil anything, and if you knew me better, you’d know I don’t say anything unless I mean it,” Honey said. “Now, let me take you around back and introduce you to the mob.”

Almost unconsciously, because it had become an extension of her arm, Karen grabbed her camera from the seat and hooked the strap over her shoulder. Since she had started working on a pictorial coffee-table book about rural America, she’d brought the camera along on her trip to Bristol, hoping she’d get some shots of the locale after she’d spoken with Jesse.

She followed Honey across the lawn to the backyard. As they rounded the corner of the house, she came face-to-face with a picture that made envy rise up to choke her. Before her was the exact scenario she’d dreamed of seeing her baby a part of one day.

Two identical little girls fought over a tire swing while a man who was obviously their father refereed. In a corner of the yard, a large golden retriever barked at another man and a young boy who were tossing a football back and forth while they watched over a grill emitting mouthwatering aromas. Not far from the grill, two women were setting a picnic table for a meal.

Karen was enthralled with the family scene and turned to thank Honey for including her. Before she could say anything, Jesse’s sister led Karen to the picnic table and within minutes had introduced her to everyone. To Karen’s astonishment, they all treated her like a member of the family and not a party crasher.

Karen adjusted her seat at the wooden picnic table and raised her camera. She looked at Emily for permission. Emily caught her glance, smiled and nodded. Focusing, Karen snapped a picture of Emily’s twin girls pouring sand into each other’s hair in the sandbox. She had just clicked the shutter when their mother discovered them and hauled them both off toward the hose on the side of the house. Once she got Emily and Kat to sign one of the release forms she had in the car, the photo would make a great cover shot for her book.

Karen had been working on the book for months and already had a sizable advance in her bank account, which would help her get through the baby’s birth and a few months after. Now, if she could just find the enthusiasm to finish it. Since Paul’s death, her instincts for survival had made her focus all her attention and energy on her baby and its well-being.

Watching this close, loving family interact made her that much more determined to find Paul’s family so her baby could have this kind of support, love and closeness, a wonderful addition to the love she knew the child would get from its grandfather and Aunt Samantha.

“Aha, we have a shutterbug among us,” Emily announced, flopping down beside Karen and eyeing the camera and its bulky zoom lens. “The expertise with which you handle that complicated-looking thing makes me think this is more than just a hobby.”

Karen laughed and laid the camera on the picnic table. “Guilty. I’m a freelance photographer.”

Before she could say more, something over Karen’s shoulder drew Emily’s attention. Jesse’s sister smiled in the direction of the field beyond the lawn’s edge and stood, their conversation forgotten. “Do my eyes deceive me, or is our brother deigning to join us?”

Everyone, including Karen, turned their attention to the man coming toward them. Jesse Kingston, his measured gait marked with obvious reluctance, slowly made his way through the field’s high grass, his head bent as if studying each step, his dark hair glistening in the sunlight.

By the time he’d reached them, Honey had come to stand next to Karen. Jesse’s older sister laid her hand on Karen’s arm and announced, “Karen Ellis, I assume you know my brother, Jesse.”

Jesse looked Karen in the eye and nodded curtly. Even though his greeting was less than cordial, Karen’s insides twisted with a strange pleasure. When his simmering, dark gaze touched her, a bottomless feeling invaded her stomach and an inexplicable warmth swept through her body. It had to be pregnancy hormones. Determined not to let him get to her on any level, personal or otherwise, she centered her gaze on his face. What she saw there didn’t surprise her. There it was again, that stark loneliness.

Jesse hid any spark of surprise at finding Karen here with his family. “Yes, Ms. Ellis and I have met.” He’d thought of every excuse not to come here and had failed to find anything that he thought his family would accept. Now, seeing this woman again—the woman who had insinuated herself into his dreams last night—he wished he’d tried harder.

Honey looked at Karen, questions evident in her expression. “But…”

“Your brother and I met at the Diner.” She dragged her amused gaze from Jesse to Honey. “But we didn’t have a chance to really talk.”

Her soft voice swept over him like a breeze off his beloved mountains. The woman hadn’t lost an ounce of appeal. And he hadn’t become less reactive to it. He rubbed his palms together to remove the light sheen of perspiration that had broken out there.

“Pleasure meeting you…again, Ms. Ellis.” He dropped his head and his gaze inadvertently landed on her breasts. His groin stirred to life. Quickly, he glanced away, then checked out the activity in the yard. “Looks like everyone’s here.”

“We’ve just been waiting for you,” Honey said, eyeing him with a look that said, We were afraid you wouldn’t show.

“Then let the festivities begin.”

Honey laughed. “I hate to point this out, little brother, but the festivities are well underway already. It’s the food that’s been waiting. Rose will be relieved that her picnic lunch hasn’t been ruined. Excuse me, Karen.” Honey hurried toward the back door of the house.

Jesse grabbed a cold beer from the galvanized tub holding the iced drinks. Ignoring Karen, he strolled to the seclusion of a large oak tree at the side of the yard and sat in the dark circle of its shade. From there, he could watch his family playing games and interacting.

But he didn’t stay centered on them for long. Instead, he found his gaze drawn to Karen. Who was she, and what did she want? Why had Honey invited a stranger to join in a family event? From the corner of his eye, he caught Karen studying him. To his displeasure, she started to walk in his direction. Evidently, the woman didn’t know the meaning of I don’t want to talk to you.

She’d only gone a few steps when she raised her camera and snapped a picture of him.

“What’s that for?” he asked, when she got close enough.

“Posterity.” She sat beside him.

Her perfume wafted to him on a light breeze that picked up a few strands of her hair and then laid them on her cheek. He itched to brush them away, test the feel of her skin, but fisted his hand around the cold beer can and asked the question that had popped into his head the moment he recognized her. “Why are you here? Certainly not to snap pictures of a family you don’t even know.”

Karen stared off into the woods beyond the lawn. By the time she spoke again, he’d all but decided she wasn’t going to answer him.

“The pictures are for a coffee-table book I’m putting together. And I’m here because Honey asked me to stay so I could speak with you.” She turned to him, her face serious, her bottom lip quivering ever so slightly. “I was Paul Jackson’s girlfriend, and I have some questions to ask you about him.”

Girlfriend?

The word exploded inside Jesse’s head like a firecracker. How could she have been Paul’s girlfriend? Paul was married.

Chapter 3

How could this woman have been Paul’s girlfriend when he was already married? But before Jesse could ask, Honey and Emily had walked across the freshly mowed backyard and sat beside him and Karen beneath the old oak’s spreading limbs.

“Rose will be bringing out the food in a few minutes,” Honey announced, then turned to Jess. “Karen needs pictures of some of the sights around town. Em and I figured you could show them to her. Maybe take her up to the ice caves.” His matchmaking sisters’ smiles reflected a small degree of self-satisfaction and the bright glow of manipulation.

They both knew that the caves were miles from civilization, infrequently visited by anyone, even tourists, and the perfect place for two people who wanted to be alone. Problem was, being alone with a woman who pulled on his emotions like an expert violinist played a Stradivarius was the last thing he wanted.

Before either Karen or Jesse could comment on his sister’s suggestion, Rose called everyone to gather around and help themselves to a platter piled high with barbecued chicken, a bowl of potato salad and a rectangular pan of baked beans. The four of them rose and slowly made their way across the yard.

For the next hour, all conversation halted as everyone dug in. Jess had missed Rose’s cooking. Shortly after the main course had disappeared and the bowls and platter stood empty, Rose went back inside the house. Smiling, she re-emerged through the screen door carrying a scrumptious looking chocolate cake. She set it carefully on the picnic table and then picked up a serving knife.

“I don’t suppose anyone wants any of this.” Rose grinned at her twin granddaughters, who whooped and scampered to her side.

“Me do,” one of the girls demanded, tugging on Rose’s apron hem.

“Me some,” the other one chimed in.

Emily groaned and levered herself from the picnic table bench beside Karen. “I couldn’t wait until they could walk and talk, but I’m beginning to think temporary insanity drove me to wish for such things.” She sighed and helped Rose cut a small piece for each of the girls. “I’m glad they’ve at least gotten teeth and aren’t eating mush anymore. Now, if we could only conquer potty training.”

Laughter rippled over the group.

Rose patted her daughter-in-law’s hand. “All in good time. All in good time.”

“Hey, Jesse, have some cake. My mother makes the best chocolate cake you have ever put in your mouth.” Kat kissed Rose’s cheek and looked down at her with a cherishing grin.

Jesse glanced at mother and son. It was hard to believe they’d only just been reunited after being separated for most of Kat’s life. It certainly didn’t resemble the reunion that had taken place in this house when, at age nine and with a newly deceased mother, Jess had come here to live and had met his father and sisters for the first time.

Jesse forced a smile. “It’s a good thing someone in your family can cook, or you’d starve to death.” He looked pointedly at Emily.

“Now, that’s not true. Rose is not the only cook in the family.” Emily paused in the task of wiping chocolate frosting from her daughter’s face, then grinned up at her handsome husband. “Kat makes a really mean lasagna.” She looked at Honey, who gave her a thumbs-up, then at her brother. “And I’d appreciate it, Jesse Kingston, if you would find a topic of conversation other than my lousy cooking.”

“But you’re so cute when you’re defending yourself,” he teased back.

Karen glanced at Jesse. Verbal banter. Safe, no emotional commitment. No physical contact allowed.

She knew how that worked. She’d often seen Paul do it. If you sidetracked people long enough with inanities, they didn’t dig for the real answers. Jesse’s silence added one more missing piece to the puzzle that made up this man. She swept her mind clear of any need to finish this particular puzzle. She had no desire to get involved in any small way with another man who was unwilling to share himself.

The family crowded around the picnic table for dessert, and Karen noted that Jess positioned himself at the very end of the bench, away from the core of activity.

When one of Emily’s girls sidled up to him, he offered her some of his cake. Her sister, not to be done out of her share of Uncle Jesse’s dessert, quickly joined them.

He leaned back and studied them. “How do you tell them apart, Em?”

Karen stepped in. “It’s easy.” She turned to Emily. “May I enlighten your brother?”

Emily nodded. “Sure. Someone needs to tell him the secret. After all, they’re his nieces and he can’t go on forever calling them ‘Hey You.’”

“Cat has a brown mole on her right wrist.” Karen watched as Jesse checked it out, then smiled when he proved her right. “Casey doesn’t have one.”

“I Cat,” the little girl announced, holding up the wrong arm for proof of her identity in an attempt to relieve any doubt as to which identical twin was which. Everyone laughed.

It suddenly struck Karen how odd it was that a stranger had learned the secret of how to tell the difference between the twins and their own uncle hadn’t. What a strange man.

Detecting a slight softening of her attitude toward Paul’s friend, Karen redirected her thoughts. Jesse Kingston might hold himself aloof from the rest of the world, but he hadn’t tangled with Karen’s determination yet. She needed information, and whether Jesse liked it or not, she would pry it out of him if it was the last thing she ever did. So far, his family had shielded him from any question she might have.

However, his family would not always be around for him to hide behind.