After Hours

“Don’t split hairs, Marcia. There are just two people under this umbrella-tell the truth for once.”

“All right, so we’re alone. So what?”

“Why did my painting make you cry?”

“Quentin, I have guests who are waiting for their coffee—come along!”

“You’re bright, you’re competent, you’re a dab hand with Belgian chocolate—and you’re scared to death of your own emotions. That’s quite a combination.”

Besides a rum and cola before dinner, Marcia had had two glasses of red wine with dinner. She said, pulling her arm free as she turned to face him and wishing that the umbrella didn’t cloister them quite so intimately, “You want the truth? I’ll give you the truth. You’re wasting your time, Quentin. I’m thirty-three years old—not fifteen. If I’m scared of emotion I presumably have adequate reasons, and if I’m as bright as you say I am they must be good reasons. I’m also much too old to be spilling out my life story to every man that comes along.”

Quentin didn’t like being bracketed with a procession of other men. He wanted to be different. He wanted to shake her up. As raindrops spattered on the umbrella he stroked the smooth fall of her hair with his free hand and said huskily, “You look like an Egyptian goddess in that outfit you’re wearing.”

Hot color flared in her cheeks. “I wouldn’t have worn it if I’d known you were coming,” she said, then could have bitten off her tongue.

He pounced. “You don’t want me seeing the real you?”

“I don’t know who the real me is anymore!” Marcia exclaimed, then rolled her eyes in self-disgust. “Telling the truth seems to be addictive. Quentin, it’s pouring rain. Let’s go.”

“Maybe I call you to truth,” he said quietly. Then he clasped her by the chin, lowered his head and kissed her full on the lips. Her lips weren’t cold; they were so soft and desirable that he lost all track of time and place in the sheer pleasure of the moment. When she suddenly jerked her chin free, it came as a physical shock.

“You mustn’t do that,’ she gabbled. ”You scarcely know me. You can’t just go kissing me as if we’re lovers in a Hollywood movie—and now you’ve got lipstick all over your mouth.”

She sounded anything but unemotional, and her first, instinctive yielding had set his head swimming. Quentin fished in his pocket, producing another handkerchief. “You’d better wipe it off,” he said.

“So that’s why you carry a hand kerchief—I should have known,” she said nastily, and scrubbed at his lips with painful vigor.

He was suddenly angry out of all proportion. Pulling his head back, he said, “Let me tell you something—my dad was a lumberjack in a little village in New Brunswick that I’m sure you’ve never heard of—Holton, in the Kennebecasis Valley—and my mom cleaned the houses of the rich folk. A white handkerchief was the mark of a gentleman to her, and when I won a provincial art competition at the age of twelve she gave me six boxes of handkerchiefs. I may not qualify as a gentleman but I loved my mother, and that’s why I always carry a white handkerchief.”

Marcia stood very still. Water was dripping from the prongs of the umbrella and her feet were getting cold. She said, “I’m sorry—I shouldn’t have said that.”

She was looking straight at him, and her apology was obviously sincere. “Okay. But you really get under my skin, Marcia Barnes.”

“That’s mutual,” she snorted, and wiped the last of the lipstick from the corner of his mouth. His nose was slightly crooked and there was a dent in his chin; his brows and lashes were as black as his hair. As for his mouth... She shivered in a way that had nothing to do with the cold. She had never been kissed like that in her life. Brief, beautiful and bewildering, she thought, tugging at his sleeve and starting off down the sidewalk, even through his coat she could feel the hard muscles of his arm.

They walked in silence for several minutes. Then Quentin said abruptly, “Have dinner with me tomorrow night.”

“I can’t.”

“Tuesday, then.”

“You’ll be in the Gatineau Hills.”

“I have a car. It’s less than an hour’s drive.”

“The store where I can get the cream is in the bottom floor of that apartment block—I won’t be a minute,” Marcia gasped, then darted from under the umbrella and ran inside.

The harsh fluorescent lighting and the aisles packed with food restored her to some kind of sanity. One kiss and I would indeed have fallen at his feet, she realized grimly, taking the container of cream out of the refrigerator and marching to the checkout. But just because my hormones are doing a dance like daffodils in springtime doesn’t mean I have to have dinner with the man. In fact, it’s precisely why I shouldn’t have dinner with him. I’m in enough of a muddle without adding a wild card like Quentin Ramsey to the pack.

She paid for the cream and went outside. Quentin was waiting for her, a tall, blue-eyed stranger standing under a streetlamp. He did call her to truth, she thought unhappily. To truth and to emotion—a devastating combination for a woman used to hiding herself from both. How was she going to convince him that she didn’t want to date him? Normally she had no trouble getting rid of men who forced their attentions on her.

As she cudgeled her brains, he forestalled her. “If you’re too busy at work to have dinner through the week, I can wait until next weekend.”

Marcia bit her lip and started to walk back the way they’d come. “Quentin, I don’t want to see you again. I’m sorry if that sounds harsh, but that’s the way it is.”

“Why not?”

She said childishly, “Because. Just because! Okay?”

“No, dammit, it’s not okay! I know you’re attracted to me, and I’m willing to bet you don’t lose your cool with anyone else the way you have with me. My painting made you cry, your whole body responds when I touch you, and the more I see of you the more I figure Lucy doesn’t have a clue what makes you tick.” He drew a harsh breath. “Plus she told me how much you wanted the painting of the three little girls—the one Troy bought for you.”

Spacing her words, Marcia seethed, “I can want a painting. That doesn’t mean I have to have dinner with the artist. You’re not a stupid man and that’s not a very complicated message. So why aren’t you getting it?”

“Because I don’t want to,” he said tightly. Although his features were inscrutable, Quentin was beginning to feel scared; any time he’d visualized finding the perfect woman she’d been as delighted to discover him as he her.

If Marcia had used her common sense she would have changed the subject. “I don’t understand you—why are you pushing me so hard?” she cried.

“If I told you, you’d laugh in my face.”

“Then please just drop it, Quentin.”

“I can’t!” He took a deep breath, trying to think. “I’m going to be seeing a fair bit of Troy and Lucy over the summer, so I’m bound to see you again. Unless you avoid them for the next two months, of course.”

“I’ll make sure when I go and see them that you’re not included,” she snapped.

“So you’re not indifferent to me... If you were, you wouldn’t care if I was there or not.”

“I don’t like being harassed.”

His steps slowed. “That’s an ugly word.”

“Then don’t do it.”

Her jaw was set mutinously. The pale sweep of her cheekbones made him ache somewhere deep inside. He said desperately, “Marcia, I don’t think I’ve ever begged a woman to spend time with me... I guess I’ve never had to. So if I’m not doing this well it’s because I haven’t had any practise. I’m begging you now. You’re important to me in ways I don’t understand but that I know to be real. Give me a chance—that’s all I ask.”

To her infinite relief she saw they’d reached the driveway to her building. It took all her courage to look up at him, and the torment in his face almost weakened her resolve. “There’s no point—please believe me.” She tried to smile. “I’m sorry.”

She was right, she knew she was; she was being sensible and rational. She had never thought of herself as an overly adept judge of male character, but she was certain that any relationship with Quentin wouldn’t be shallow. Better to end whatever was between them now rather than later.

So why was she filled with the same bitter regret that his painting had called up in her? And why did she feel as though she’d just trampled on a whole field of daffodils?

She stalked into the building and up the stairs, and before she unlocked her door forced a bright smile on her face.

The next two hours were purgatory. But finally Evelyn and Henry stood up and everyone else followed their lead.

Quentin pushed back his chair, trying to stretch the tension from his shoulders. Troy had trounced him royally at chess because his mind had been anywhere but on the game. His thoughts had been going round and round in circles that had ended up exactly nowhere. He should have kept his cool with Marcia. Kept things light and on the surface. Instead he’d kissed her before she was ready, and badgered her as if his sole intention had been to push her away.

For a man she’d said wasn’t stupid, he’d sure blown it. Nor did he have any idea what he was going to do next. According to Marcia, there wasn’t any next.

He was the last one to go out the door. Marcia shrank away from him, and he saw that there were faint blue shadows under her eyes. Filled with a passionate compunction, and another emotion that he wasn’t quite ready to label fear, he said roughly, “If you change your mind, get in touch with me. You can always reach me through Lucy and Troy.”

“Yes... yes, of course,” she said, already starting to close the door.

She couldn’t wait to be rid of him—that was the message. Quentin headed for the elevator where the rest of them were waiting, somehow made appropriate small talk until Troy dropped him off at the hotel and then headed for the bar. There were times in life when only a double rum would do.

CHAPTER THREE

THE following Sunday Marcia had lunch with Lucy. When they were settled in an alcove in the salad bar that was Lucy’s favorite and they’d made their choices from the menu, Lucy took a sip of her wine and said with sisterly frankness, “You don’t look so hot, Marcia.”

Marcia knew that she didn’t, and she knew why. Opting for part of the truth, because she certainly wasn’t going to talk about Quentin, she said, “Last Tuesday I was. called into the director’s office and informed that due to budget restraints the junior staff are being required to take a week’s holiday without pay. As soon as possible. So as of Friday afternoon I’ve been on vacation.”

Lucy went right to the heart of the matter. “What does that do to your research?”

“The particular drugs I’ve been working with aren’t available either—all of a sudden they’re too expensive. So almost three months’ work could go down the drain.” Marcia grimaced in frustration. “It’s driving me crazy.”

“How secure is your job?” Lucy asked bluntly.

Marcia twirled the stem of her glass, not looking at her sister. “I might lose it,” she said, and heard the telltale quiver in her voice.

Lucy reached a hand across the tablecloth. “Oh, Marcie...”

Marcia bit her lip. “It’s crazy—there are lots of people much worse off than I am. But I really love my job.” She took a big swallow of her wine. “They’re supposed to make an announcement within two or three weeks.”

Lucy said gently, “Your whole life revolves around your research.”

“Stop it, Lucy, or I’ll be blubbering all over you,” Marcia said with a watery grin. “Have some bread.”

“‘Blubbering’, as you put it, can be a perfectly fine response.”

“Not in a crowded restaurant.”

Lucy slathered butter on a slab of crunchy French bread. “I suppose you’re right. So what will you do with yourself all week?”

“I’m not sure yet.” Not for anything would she reveal to her sister that the thought of seven more days with absolutely nothing to do filled her with panic.

“I’ve got an idea! You can go to Quentin’s cottage in the Gatineau Hills.”

“Don’t be silly,” Marcia said sharply, her nerves shrilling like a burglar alarm at the sound of his name.

“He won’t be there—it’s perfect. He left for New York today. One of his works got vandalized in a gallery in SoHo, and he felt he had to go and see the damage himself. He said he wouldn’t be back until Friday or Saturday.”

She could get out of her condo and away from the city. “I never was much for the great outdoors,” Marcia prevaricated.

“Troy and Chris and I were there all day yesterday—it’s a beautiful spot on a lake, with lovely woods and wildflowers. And the cottage is luxurious. Not what you’d call roughing it.”

“I couldn’t do that without asking him, Lucy. And it’s too late if he’s already left.”

“I’ll take full responsibility—you see, he was hoping we’d stay there. But Troy gets his lunch hours free and a couple of afternoons through the week, and I like to spend all the time I can with him. So I’m sure it’d be fine with Quentin if you stayed at the cottage.”

Marcia was sensitive enough to pick up what Lucy wasn’t saying. Lucy and Troy’s first child had died at the age of seven months—a tragedy that had ripped apart the fabric of their marriage; they had lived separately for over a year. Now that they were back together Lucy hated to be away from Troy, and, she had once confided to Marcia, she felt safer when Troy was near for Chris as well.

Marcia said spontaneously, “Chris is a sweetheart, Lucy.”

A film of tears covered Lucy’s gray-blue eyes. “Yes, he is—we’re very lucky. Now that he’s older than seven months, I feel so much more relaxed too—silly, isn’t it?” She helped herself to another slice of bread. “Do you ever think you might want children?”

“What kind of a question’s that?” Marcia said lightly.

“You looked very sweet holding Chris—even though he was dribbling all over you.”

“I’ve never been a mother but I’m sure there’s more to it than standing around looking sweet. How are Troy’s courses going?”

“Fine. You didn’t answer the question.”

“I’m not going to. Because I don’t know the answer.”

Lucy stared at her thoughtfully. “You didn’t hit it off with Quentin, did you?”

Marcia scowled. “Did you invite me out for lunch just so you could subject me to an inquisition?”

“Yes,” said Lucy, with one of her insouciant grins.

The waitress gave Marcia her Greek salad and Lucy her seafood salad. “Can I get you anything else, ladies?”

“That’s fine, thanks,” Marcia said, and picked up her fork.

She was worried sick about her job—that was an undeniable fact. But there was another reason that she looked far from her best. And that reason was Quentin. She’d only met the man twice, but somehow he’d insinuated his way into her life, so that his rugged face came between her and the computer screen and his loose-limbed stride accompanied her down the corridors of the institute. At work, where she was so disciplined, she’d more or less managed to keep him in order. But at home in her condo it was another story.

She hadn’t slept well all week. But when she did sleep she dreamed about Quentin, night after night. Sometimes they were dreams so erotic that she woke blushing, her whole body on fire with needs that even in the darkness she could scarcely bring herself to acknowledge as her own. But at other times she woke from nightmares—horrible nightmares that left her heart pounding with terror and her palms wet.

They were always the same: she was drowning in the sea, being pulled down and down into the deep blue depths of a bottomless and merciless ocean, and when she suddenly saw Quentin’s face through the swirling currents and tried to signal to him to rescue her he was always out of reach, his black hair waving like seaweed, his smile full of mockery.

“I really don’t want to talk about Quentin, Lucy,” she said shortly.

Lucy, known for being impulsive, chewed on a mouthful of shrimp and said nothing. Marcia picked at her black olives and decided they’d used too much olive oil. She said at random, “What did you think of Mother’s friend Henry?”

“I thought he was a sweetheart. Do you think she’ll marry him?”

“Mother? Get married again? No!”

“She must get lonely sometimes. Troy and I live in Vancouver, and you and Cat are both very busy women.”

“Workaholics, you mean,” Marcia said drily. It was the word Quentin had used.

“I’m trying to be polite,” Lucy chuckled. “Oh, Marcia, it’s so neat that Troy and I are having a couple of months in Ottawa! I love Vancouver, and I don’t have to tell you how much I love Troy and Chris—but I do miss my family.”

It was the perfect opportunity for Marcia to say that she missed Lucy. But was it true? Or did Lucy, with her tumbled curls and her untidy emotions, simply stir Marcia up in ways she both resented and feared? “Families are complicated,” she said obliquely.

“Mmm, that’s true enough ... You know, it’s funny, but I really thought you and Quentin would like each other.”

“Lay off, Lucy.”

“When we saw him yesterday he looked as awful as you do. And he didn’t want to talk about you any more than you want to talk about him.”

“Then maybe you should take the hint.”

“But he was such a good friend to me on Shag Island—I met him there, remember, when Troy and I were separated.” Lucy speared another shrimp. “He was like the brother we never had.”

Marcia could not possibly picture Quentin as her brother. She said flatly, “He’s too intense for me—he came on too strong. I’m sorry I spoiled your fantasy, but there it is. Now, can we please talk about something—or someone—else?”

Lucy sighed. “Troy’s always telling me I’m a hopeless romantic. Okay, okay—I’ll drop it. But I will give you the key to the cottage and the directions. You should take your own food—Quentin’s not what you’d call a model housekeeper. And, providing you leave there by Friday morning, there’s no danger of you running into him. More’s the pity.”

Marcia glared at her. Lucy went on hurriedly, “Next Saturday why don’t you come for dinner with Troy and me and we’ll go to a movie? Cat’s offered to baby sit.” She gave a shamefaced smile. “I’m still not comfortable leaving Chris with a sitter who doesn’t have an MD after her name. Silly, isn’t it?”

“I think it’s very understandable,” Marcia said, sharing the last of the carafe of wine between them. “What movie do you want to see?”

As Lucy began discussing the merit of various new releases Marcia found herself remembering the year that Lucy had lived in Ottawa and then on Shag Island, and Troy had lived in Vancouver; their unhappiness had been a measure of the depth of their love—she hadn’t been so wrapped up in her own concerns that she hadn’t understood that. She had been helpless to fix what was wrong, and that, too, had been a new experience. She liked to feel in control of events.

Maybe, she thought slowly, that was the year when she’d begun to sense the sterility of her own life; the tragedy that had struck Lucy and Troy had been the origin of a confusion and a lack of focus that was both new to her and horribly unsettling.

And that made Quentin fifty times worse.

“There’s that new historical movie too,” she said. “One of the technicians at work saw it and really liked lit.”

For the rest of their lunch they talked about anything but family and men, although Marcia did find herself clutching the key to the cottage and a map sketched on a paper placemat when she went back to her car. And why not? she thought rebelliously. If she spent all next week in her condo, she’d be talking to the plants. A few days beside a lake with lots of books and no people would be just fine.

But she’d leave there Thursday evening, to make sure that she didn’t meet up with Quentin.

Marcia got away on Monday morning, her little gray car loaded with food, clothes, books and a portable TV. She drove along the eastern shore of the Gatineau River, humming to herself. How long since she’d done something like this? Too long. Her vacations tended to be carefully planned affairs with equally carefully chosen friends, not last-minute escapades all by herself.

She was going to read all the novels she’d bought in the last year that had been stashed on her shelves because she hadn’t had time to get at them. She’d experiment with some new pasta recipes. She’d watch the shows she always missed on TV because something needed doing at the lab. She was going to have a great time.

Marcia got lost twice trying to follow the penciled squiggles on her sister’s map; Lucy wasn’t blessed with a sense of direction. But finally the little side road she had been following forked in two just as it was supposed to. When she took the right fork within three hundred yards she saw a wooden gate with a plaque attached to the post. “Richardson” it said. That was the name of Quentin’s friends, the ones who owned the cottage.

Marcia got out, opened the gate, drove through and closed it behind her. Her car bumped down a lane overhung with newly leafed beech trees and red-tasseled maples. Then she emerged into a clearing and braked.

Through the lacy fretwork of the trees the lake sparkled and danced. A carpet of white trilliums patterned the forest floor. And the cottage—the cottage was beautiful.

It was a house more than a cottage, a cedar house with a wood-shingled roof and a broad stone chimney; it merged with its surroundings perfectly. Smiling fatuously, Marcia drove to the circle of gravel at the end of the driveway and parked her car.

Over the deep silence of the woods she could hear the ripple of the lake on the shore and a chorus of bird song. The front of the house, which faced the lake, was made of panels of glass set in thick beams reaching to the peak of the roof. The tree trunks and the blue of the sky were reflected in the glass.

Like a woman in a dream she walked up the stone path to the front door. The key turned smoothly in the lock. She stepped inside and gave a gasp of dismay.

What had Lucy said? Something about Quentin not being a model housekeeper?

That, thought Marcia, was the understatement of the year.

Clothes were flung over the furniture, books, newspapers and dirty dishes were strewn on the tables and the floor and an easel and a clutter of painting equipment decorated the corner with the most light. She wrinkled her nose. Over the smell of turpentine and linseed oil was a nastier smell. From the kitchen. Bracing herself, she stepped over an untidy heap of art magazines and discovered on the counter the remains of Quentin’s supper: a wilting Caesar salad over which three houseflies were circling. The anchovies were the source of the odor.

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