Be My Babies

“I loved feeling the babies move. Do you know what they are?”

She took the phone, but before she spoke into it she grinned at Jenna. “Yep, one of each.”

“Isn’t that great, Daddy?” Jenna said.

“Great,” Simon said, staring at Lily. “Just great.”

DEREK WAKEFIELD rolled over in bed and reached for Liliana. When he came up with only a handful of silk duvet, he grunted. Gradually, he came awake to the smell of stale booze. There was a putrid taste in his mouth.

“Aw, shit,” he said, burying his face in his pillow. As awareness dawned, he began to crave another drink. Slowly, he opened one eye and stared at the clock until it came into focus. Noon. What day was it?

Sighing, he turned onto his back, and his stomach pitched. The bright sun slanted in from the skylight and hurt his eyes. Liliana liked spring afternoons—maybe he’d take her to the park. She looked so cute in that straw sun hat he’d bought her in the Caribbean.

Then he remembered. Liliana wasn’t here. She’d left in the middle of the night a week ago. Why had she done that? He had a vague recollection of something…her walking in…something happened. His head began to pound when he thought about it too hard.

The phone rang and he dragged a pillow over his head to block out the sound. When it persisted, he picked up the bedroom extension. “’ello.”

“Derek, it’s me.”

“Hello, Mother.”

“Are you all right?”

Sighing, he hoisted himself up and stuffed a pillow behind him. “I’m fine.”

“You missed a meeting with vendors this morning.”

“I did?”

“Listen, darling, I know you’re upset that Liliana left, though I think it might be for the best. But your father isn’t happy about your not showing up.”

“I’m sorry, Mother.” For a lot of things. Not the least of which was the wreckage he came face-to-face with when he looked around the bedroom. The desk chair was on its side. A lamp lay broken on the floor. A wastebasket was tipped over, its contents tumbling out onto the floor.

And several pictures of him and Liliana were smashed into pieces. He must have lost it last night. Damn, why did she have to leave him? He couldn’t function without her.

You couldn’t function with her, either.

He swore vilely.

“Derek!”

“Sorry, Mother. I stubbed my toe. What were you saying?”

“Would you like me to come over there? I could cancel my nail appointment. I know Liliana didn’t appreciate my visits, but now that she’s gone…”

He rubbed a hand over his jaw. God—days of growth. He could smell himself, too, and it wasn’t pleasant. “No, Mother. I’m going to shower and head over to the office.”

“Placate your father, dear.”

“All right. I’ll talk to you later.”

He hung up and surveyed the room again.

No wonder Liliana had left him.

Chapter Three

“OH, MR. MARTINI, they’re beautiful.” Simon watched Lily gush as she knelt on the floor of the reception area and picked up a furry black creature. She looked cute in a dark pink-and-red skirt and pink blouse. Not for the first time, he noticed how attractive she was. “He’s so little. And soft.”

“I like the one with white on his face.” Jenna scooped another kitten out of the box, and Simon watched as she held it the same way Lily held hers. For a minute, he worried. His daughter mimicked Lily Wakefield a lot these days. Then, with less effort than last week, he let it go. He believed in the old adage that you could tell a person’s true character by how he or she treated children, older people and animals.

In the three weeks she’d been in Fairview, Lily had earned gold stars in all categories. She even had the cranky O’Malley brothers behaving. They owned the local pub and usually made everybody miserable. It was odd how people in small towns were so trusting. But Simon vowed he’d keep a clear head about her. He would try not to jump to conclusions.

“Any takers on the ads?” Lily asked Mr. Martini, as she scratched the kitten’s neck. Her nails were painted pink to match her blouse.

The seventy-year-old man smiled at Lily. “All but these two.” He stretched out a stiff leg, and winked at Simon. “Don’t know what I’m gonna do with the last of them.”

Jenna’s eyes widened. She looked heartbreakingly young in overall shorts and a T-shirt, with her long hair pulled back in a ponytail. “Oh, Dad, can we?”

He stuck his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “Who’d take care of it?”

“Me. I’m not a baby. Lily says I’m very mature for my age.” She lifted a chin in a haughty manner. She’d learned that from Lily, too. “I can do it.”

“Well, if Lily said so.” The woman already had spent an inordinate amount of time with Jenna. She was even taking his daughter along to her next prenatal checkup after Jenna had begged to hear the babies’ heartbeats.

Lily looked over at Simon. Her smile was genuine and it did beautiful things to her eyes. Her face, fuller now, was alight with that pregnancy glow. He wondered about her life before she came here and why it had been stressful enough to make her thin and pale, as she’d been when she arrived. Gil hadn’t told him and he hadn’t asked. “They make wonderful pets, Simon.”

“I’ll think about it.”

After a minute, Lily stood and stretched, placing her hands on the small of her back.

“Your back hurt, Lily?” Jenna asked.

“A bit. I can’t figure out why. I’m not quite five months along. I haven’t gained that much weight. I’m not even in maternity clothes.”

“Cells are dividing in your lower back, stretching your muscles to accommodate the babies. Probably more than normal with twins.”

She stared at Simon, as if he were speaking Greek. “How do you know that?”

Simon brushed his hand down Jenna’s hair. “I learned everything I could about my baby girl, even before she was born.”

Mr. Martini harrumphed. “In my day, we didn’t take much interest.” He went on to tell Lily about his wife, who’d been dead ten years, and his four kids, all of whom had moved away to bigger cities.

Seating herself across from the older man, Lily listened intently, petting the kitten the whole time. Simon watched that soft rhythmic stroke, mesmerized. It stirred something inside him; something he hadn’t felt in a long time.

Eventually, Mr. Martini struggled to his feet. “So, should I take them back with me?”

“Dad?”

“All right. You can have one.”

Mr. Martini zeroed in on Lily. “What about you, young lady?”

“Me? Oh, no, I can’t have a kitten.” Her expression was sad.

“Why not?”

“What if I don’t stay?” Her voice trailed off, reminding Simon of the damage she could do to Gil and Jenna if— when—she left Fairview. Lately, that had been even more of a concern to him than her laying claim to the paper.

Then, she surprised them all by saying, “You know what? Yes, I’m going to take him.”

“Yay!” Jenna threw her arms around Lily. “They can visit each other for company.”

Lily laughed, Jenna laughed, and Mr. Martini forgot for a minute to maintain his gruff exterior and smiled broadly.

The front door opened, and Mr. Martini said under his breath, “Here comes Her Ladyship.”

“Hush,” Lily told him, then turned to the visitor. “Miss Jameson, how nice to see you.” She nodded to the woman’s outfit. “That green dress goes great with your hair and eyes.”

“Thank you, dear.” She held up a basket. “I brought you some muffins.”

A lot of people in town had been trying to feed her over the past month. “Oh, dear. I’m going to be a blimp by the time the babies come.”

The woman glanced at her stomach. “Are they doing well?”

“Yes. Kicking up a storm.”

“It must be a nice feeling.” Miss Jameson had been Simon’s high school English teacher, as well as Jenna’s now, and as far as he knew, she had never married or had a child. There was an aura of mystery to her, too, since she came from the big city and had settled here, all chic and sophisticated, like Lily. Miss Jameson glanced at Mr. Martini, who was heading for the door. “No need to go on my account, Marco.”

“Job’s done here, Loretta.” He tipped his summer hat. “Goodbye, ladies. Simon. Don’t work our girl too hard.”

As if he’d had any choice. “I won’t.”

Leaving the women to coo over babies and kittens, Simon went back to his office just off the newsroom and sat down at his desk. The mock-up of the classifieds was finished. He shook his head, wondering how life had changed so significantly in less than a month.

Lily had been working at the paper since that day Simon couldn’t reach Gil and she’d pitched in to help out. When Gil had found her at the office, he’d come up with the idea himself.

“This is perfect for you, Lily. You can sit down and take phone calls.”

“I can do more,” she’d said excitedly. She glanced at Simon, who knew his displeasure at the idea showed on his face. “I have some suggestions for the layout of the ads.”

“Already?” he asked.

“If it’s okay with you.”

She was always so hesitant, so self-effacing, that it had been hard to hang on to his doubts. Besides, Simon was sensible, if nothing else. “Sure. Truthfully, I’ve thought they needed an overhaul, but Tom Barker’s way too busy just getting the ad accounts.”

“Great.” The smile on Gil’s face had also made it hard for Simon to cling to his reservations.

Since that day, Simon’s negative feelings about Lily had dwindled even more. He stared at his latest editorial on global warming, thinking about how Lily was winning everybody over, including him. She’d been enthusiastic about these weekly columns, too, offering insights and effusive praise.

She came back to the office a half hour later.

“Where’s the kitten?”

“Jenna took both of them home. Miss Jameson was going to drive her, and get some food and kitty litter for them on the way. I hope that’s all right.”

“Yeah, as you said, she’s a big girl.”

“I can stop by and get Blackie on my way home.”

“Blackie? Very original.”

“Hers is Whiteface.”

“Clever.”

She regarded him with a knowing smile.

“What?”

“You’re a good father, Simon.”

“Am I?”

Perching on the edge of a chair, Lily crossed her legs. The gesture distracted him. She hadn’t worn stockings, so her legs were bare, and through her open-toed sandals he could see her pink toenails. “You know you are. Jenna’s a wonderful girl. You’ve raised her well.”

He leaned back and felt the familiar tightness in his chest. “When she got hurt, I thought I’d die.”

“Jenna was hurt? Gil didn’t tell me.”

“Her, um, mother died in a car accident when Jenna was five. Jenna was in the backseat.”

“Oh, no.” Was that moisture in her eyes? “How badly hurt was she?”

“A broken arm and leg. She had to have a pin put in her femur. And then there were years of therapy, to get her to walk without a limp.”

“You’d never know. She’s so graceful now.”

“Thank God.”

Giving him a watery smile, Lily shook her head. “You’ve had a difficult life.”

“You, too, I’m guessing.”

She averted her gaze over his shoulder.

“You don’t have to tell me. I know I’ve been unpleasant to you.”

Looking back at him, she asked, “Why, Simon? I can tell it’s not in your nature to be unkind.”

“The truth?”

“Of course. Always.”

“At first I worried about your motives. That you came here to…” He struggled for the right word. “Milk Gil, I guess.”

“I’d never do such a thing.”

“I see that now. If he buys you any kind of gift, even chocolates, you balk.”

Her hands curled on her lap. “I guess you were right to worry. I just showed up out of the blue. I could have been anybody, wanting anything.” When he didn’t say more, she asked, “You said at first? What about now?”

“I’m not worried about that anymore.”

“What are you worried about?”

“When you go away, Jenna and Gil will be hurt. Every day, they invest more in you.”

No response.

“I caught what you said out there about not taking the kitten. Because you didn’t know if you’d be staying here.”

“My life’s a mess, Simon. I don’t want to hurt anybody while I’m trying to straighten it out.”

“Are you? Straightening it out?”

“Yes, I think so. I’ve contacted a lawyer. He’s sending my husband legal separation papers.”

“Ah.” Simon knew only that she’d left her husband for what Gil considered good reasons. And now, the fact that she was asking the guy for a separation made Simon glad. It must be because it meant she was moving on with her life and wasn’t planning to go back to her old one. For Gil and Jenna, of course. “Will he sign them?”

“I hope so.” He could see the sadness in her eyes. This was hard for her.

“If I knew the situation,” he found himself saying, “I might be less wary.”

“I’m ashamed to talk about it.”

“For what it’s worth, I’m ashamed of some things about my past, too.”

Lily laughed, a bright sound that filled the office. He liked it. A lot. “Are you kidding? Gil, Jenna, the whole town think you walk on water.”

“I’ve gone under a time or two.” He shrugged. “But I don’t like to talk about those things, so I really shouldn’t ask you about your private life.”

She bit her lip. Her vulnerability struck a chord in him. She was determined and strong, too, a combination that was far too appealing to him as a man.

“I’ll tell you about it, Simon. But I’d appreciate it if you didn’t share this with Jenna. It’s not pretty.”

“All right, I won’t.” He watched her. “And I won’t judge, Lily. I promise.”

“Thanks.”

And then she told him her story.

THE MINUTE LILY WALKED into Simon’s house she felt a sense of well-being. Her modern three-story back in Westchester County, with its soaring pillars, high ceilings and acres of windows, was a showplace, but it had never, ever felt like a home, as this one did.

The floors and trim around the doorways were done in warm wood in the foyer and in the rooms on either side. Off to the right, a fireplace stood guard in a living room filled with comfortably upholstered earth-toned furniture. Splashes of whimsy were everywhere, in colorful pillows and throws and frames. So different from her expensive, hard-edged modern furniture, these sofas and chairs beckoned you to curl up on them. On the other side of the entrance was a dining room, again with light oak furniture and padded chairs. The aroma of beef coming from the kitchen completed the homey picture.

“Lily!” A rumble on the stairs followed the shouted greeting. “You’re here.”

Gil had let them in unannounced.

“Hi, sweetie.” They hugged, and Lily held on to the girl an extra second. Her hair was damp, as if she’d just washed it with rose-scented shampoo.

“Hey, what am I, Princess? Chopped liver?” Gil accepted a second hug warmly.

“Oh, Grandpa Gil. You know I love you.”

“Mmm. Me, too.” As Jenna took their raincoats and hung them up, he asked, “What’s that I smell?”

“Your favorite. Pot roast. Dad says you can have some, but not a lot. ‘Cuz of your heart.”

“Did you make dinner?”

“Mostly.” This from Simon, who walked down the hallway, wearing an apron that read, Kiss The Cook.

When Lily’s first thought was that that sounded like a great idea, she chided herself. But he looked so good wearing a red shirt beneath the apron and jeans that fit his butt like a glove. She admonished herself for the wayward thoughts and the perusal.

“Welcome to our home, Lily.”

He was looking at her differently, too. Ever since she had told him last week about Derek, he’d been nicer. Kinder. Sweet, really. She’d begun to like Simon McCarthy, and she thought she was making headway in getting him to like her, too. Though something niggled at her.

He was concerned about Gil and Jenna, if she left town abruptly, but there was something else that was bothering him, too. Usually, she got the feeling at the paper, when she wanted to try something new. He’d shut down and become cold or distant. Not now, though. He was smiling with genuine warmth.

“You have a lovely house.”

“Daddy did a lot of the work on it.”

“Really?”

“Uh-huh. My pride and joy.”

“Marco Martini and I helped,” Gil put in. “Then, we all worked on my kitchen. The old codger’s wanted to buy my house from under me for as long as I can remember, so he was trying to rack up some points.”

“And you’re not selling, of course.” Simon started down the hall. “Come back and sit.”

They followed him to the back.

The family room flowed into the kitchen and was demarcated by a rug that bumped up against the ceramic tile. A bank of windows faced the wooded backyard. Off the kitchen was an enclosed porch, its screens open, despite the rain outside. “This is gorgeous.”

“Thanks. We like it.” He took the wine they’d brought with them. “Want a glass?” he asked Gil.

“If Lily doesn’t mind.”

“I made you tea, Lily,” Jenna said. “The kind you brew with a ball.”

“Go ahead, have the wine. I’ll help.”

Gil said, “I’m going to beat Jenna at cards.”

Lily followed Simon into the kitchen while Gil and Jenna went into the family room.

“Can I have some wine, Dad?” Jenna called out from there.

“I’ll pour you a sip or two.”

Curious about the indulgence, Lily cocked her head as Simon got her a mug and took wineglasses out of the cupboard.

“It takes the mystery out of drinking,” he explained quietly. “Hopefully, as a result, she won’t feel the need to experiment outside of the house.”

Lily’s hand went to her midsection, which was just rounding a bit as her fifth month got into full swing. “I wonder if I’ll ever know what to do with these babies.”

He gave her the mug. “You will. A lot of it’s instinct, but I read child-rearing books, too.” He poured wine for the rest of them.

As Lily got her tea, she said, “Thanks for having us for dinner. Too bad your sister couldn’t make it.”

“She’s a busy lawyer. There’s only Sara and Mac Madison in the firm, and they have clients from all the neighboring towns.”

Lily knew Mac. On Gil’s advice, she’d met with him a few weeks after she’d arrived. He’d filed for her legal separation.

“I’d like to meet Sara. In any case, I appreciate your having us for dinner.”

A silence. Then, “We have Gil over all the time.”

Oh, no. She’d never thought of this. “You haven’t had Gil to dinner since I’ve been here. It’s been more than five weeks.”

“He’s been busy with you.”

“I’m sorry I interfered. Did you mind?”

“The truth?”

That’s what he’d said at the paper that day last week. She nodded.

“Yeah, I minded some. But Gil needed time with you.”

“It won’t happen again, Simon. I won’t come between you and Gil.”

His face shadowed, and there it was—that feeling Lily got, that her words, or sometimes her actions, meant more to him than what she’d intended.

They joined Gil and Jenna in the living room. “What are you playing?” Lily asked.

Simon shook his head. “Poker.”

“Yeah, Grandpa Gil taught me how.”

Gil arched his brows at Lily. He looked younger when he teased. “You know how to play?”

“I’m afraid not.” Bridge had been big in her circles. She’d never liked it, but Derek had insisted she join a club.

“Maybe we can teach you some seven-card stud after dinner.”

“You’re on, for whatever that is.”

When Lily went to take a seat, she noticed something hanging on the wall opposite the couch. “Oh, my.”

Jenna looked over. “It’s all right, isn’t it?”

“Why, yes, of course.” She stared at the matted and framed picture she’d drawn of Jenna. “At least I got to finish it.”

“You’re very talented, Lily,” Gil said.

“Thank you. My mother started me young.”

A silence invaded the room like an unwanted guest. She had yet to tell Gil the details of what had happened to Cameron and whenever something like this came up, it was awkward.

“She continued to draw? She was really good in high school.”

“Yes, I know. I found some of her work in the boxes you left out.”

Gil’s eyes were sad. Lily said no more about Cameron and Simon tried to cover for the awkwardness. “Did I tell you the advertising income for the paper has gone up by a third this quarter, Gil? I’ll show you the figures later.”

The unhappiness faded from her grandfather’s face. “That’s terrific. I’m guessing that some folks have taken out classifieds just to make contact with our new helper here. I even saw Mike O’Malley being nice to her the other day.”

Lily chuckled. She thought the same thing about the ads and people’s attitudes. It was wonderful for her battered ego.

“Eddie McPherson stops in all the time,” Jenna said, mentioning a local firefighter. “I think he likes her.”

Lily shifted uncomfortably. Gil looked away and so did Simon.

“What did I say?” Jenna asked.

“Lily’s married, honey.”

“Yeah, but she left her husband. She’s living here, now.”

Reaching out, Lily touched Jenna’s arm. “I did more than that, sweetie. I’ve sent him papers asking for a legal separation.”

“So, good.” Jenna went back to her cards. “But watch out for Eddie. They call him Fast Eddie.”

“Jenna!”

“I’m not a baby, Grandpa.”

Simon chuckled. “You get no argument from me about Eddie. I went to high school with him. That was his nickname then, too.”

“Speaking of names, do you have them picked out for the babies, Lily?” Gil asked.

“No, not yet.”

“What are you considering?”

“I’d like to keep that to myself for now. As soon as I decide, I’ll let you know.”

A buzzer went off in the kitchen. Simon rose. “Dinner’s ready. Jenna, you can help me. Gil and Lily, why don’t you go into the dining room.”

When they were all seated and the food was in front of them, Simon said grace. And Lily was mesmerized by the soothing rhythm of his voice, raised in prayer. She was also struck by the notion that this must be what a real family dinner was like.

She’d never experienced one before in her life.

SIMON LOOKED OVER at Gil from his desk as he read a spreadsheet, a copy of the one Gil held in his hand. Gil said, “This is good, don’t you think?”

“Yes. Though I wish we could widen the market in Gainesville.”

“Let’s talk about how to do that.”

Simon glanced at the door, thinking of Lily and how pretty she looked in the peach linen slacks and long-sleeved shirt she was wearing tonight. Her hair was soft and shiny, too, and curled a bit from the rain. “They’ll be okay?”

“We were in the way. Jenna was dying to get Lily up to her room. I heard some rumblings about makeup.”

“She’s a little young for war paint.” And Lily certainly didn’t need any.

“I hate to break it to you, Simon, but girls start with all that at about eleven.”

“God forbid.”

Leaning back in his chair, Simon watched the man he’d come to think of as a second father. Patrick McCarthy could never be replaced, but there was a unique spot in his heart for Gil. To ease this particular burden, he asked, “Lily hasn’t said anything about what happened to Cameron?”

“Just the bare bones. I asked her to elaborate a few weeks ago, and gave her another opportunity just now, but she didn’t take it. I’m guessing it was bad. I almost don’t want to know how Cameron lived. Or how Lily grew up.”

“Sometimes knowing isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.” Simon was sure of that.

Gil cocked his head. “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“You didn’t like her at first. Why?”

“Because I was worried she was using you. I was afraid she was out to get whatever she could from you.”