The Rake's Rebellious Lady

‘I have distressed you. Forgive me, Miss Holbrook.’

‘I think that perhaps I have been rude? I am the one to ask for understanding, Sir Frederick. I was upset and spoke too hastily. Indeed, I was glad to be rescued.’

‘No forgiveness is needed,’ he assured her. ‘I would have you no other way, Miss Holbrook. I prefer that a young lady should speak her mind—and I find you most refreshing.’

Was that another way of saying that she was ill mannered, but to be forgiven because of her youth? Caroline was not sure if he was mocking her or not, because she was sure that he was laughing inside. She decided that the best thing to do was to retain a dignified silence, which she did for the remainder of their dance, but when he asked if he might escort her into supper she was obliged to smile and thank him.

‘And thus might Saint Joan have looked as she was taken to the stake,’ he said in a low voice, and as she looked up she saw that his eyes were bright with laughter. ‘Am I still to be permitted to take you driving, Miss Holbrook?’

‘Do you still wish to?’

‘Yes, certainly,’ he said. ‘I believe…’

What he had been about to say was missed, for they were joined by Julia and a party of young bucks, and after seeing that Caroline had all she needed, Sir Frederick soon left them to the enjoyment of their supper. When she looked for him later, she realised that he must have gone.

She could not help feeling piqued, because she did not know what she had done to give him such a poor opinion of her. It was true that if she married well she might be able to make Mama’s life better, and she would like to do something for her brothers too—but she would not wish to marry exclusively for money. Indeed, she could not imagine herself married to most of the gentlemen she knew…

Chapter Three

Caroline was thoughtful as she went to bed that evening. She was aware that the evening had been very pleasant, and she was enjoying her stay in town—but for some reason the sparkle had gone out of things after Sir Frederick had left the ball. Now why should that be? She had continued to dance all evening and many of her partners were very personable young men—but somehow none of them made her feel quite as alive as Sir Frederick.

Why had he left early? She wondered if she had offended him by being a little sharp and was sorry that she had been hasty. He’d seemed to imagine that she was interested in making an advantageous marriage and that had made her angry. What had she done to give such an ill opinion of her? Caroline pondered the question, but could not think that she had done anything. It was hardly her fault if she had attracted the attention of several important and wealthy men. She ought not to have said anything about being a duchess, though; the memory made her feel ill at ease with herself.

Sir Frederick had said that he still wished to take her driving, but she was afraid that she might have given him a dislike for her company. She was at heart a very well-behaved young lady despite being sometimes reckless. She decided that the next time they met she would be more careful of her behaviour.

The following day was quite taken up by shopping and appointments with the seamstress, and in the evening they attended a musical event. There was no sign of either Sir Frederick or Mr Bellingham, and Caroline wore a rather fixed smile all evening, and was rebuked by her aunt for being above her company.

‘You may be bored, Caroline, but if you show it so plainly you will soon find that you are no longer invited anywhere.’

‘I am sorry, Aunt,’ Caroline said. ‘I did not mean to offend anyone, but I am feeling…’ She sighed, because she did not know why her spirits were at a low ebb. She ought not to feel as if the evening were pointless just because her particular friends were not present. ‘Perhaps I am a little tired.’

It was merely an excuse, she knew, but she was glad when it was time to leave and she could be alone in her own room. She was a little on edge, and she wondered whether or not Sir Frederick would keep his appointment to take her driving the next morning.

She need not have worried, for he arrived at the appointed time. He looked extremely handsome in his blue coat and pale breeches, his boots having the kind of shine that only a valet of the first order could bestow on them.

‘Miss Holbrook,’ he said as the footman announced him, showing him into the downstairs parlour where Caroline was pretending to read a news sheet that had just been delivered. ‘You look charming this morning, if I may be allowed to say so?’

‘Thank you, sir. You are very kind.’

‘You are ready?’

‘Yes, of course.’ Caroline smiled, allowing none of her uncertainty to show as she picked up her gloves and went out into the hall. ‘You will not want to keep your horses waiting.’

She was assisted with her pelisse, and, tying the ribbons of her bonnet, followed him outside. The young lad Freddie employed as his tiger was walking the horses and brought the phaeton back to them.

‘Thank you, Jim. Up with you now, lad.’ Freddie turned to Caroline as the lad obeyed. She had noticed that he was driving a pair of perfectly matched greys.

‘Mr Bellingham told me that you had some fine chestnuts, sir. Have you changed your horses recently?’

‘No, but I had a chance to purchase these and thought they would be a splendid addition to my stables. One can never have too many horses.’

‘Oh, I agree. I should imagine anyone would be pleased to own these.’

‘Not all young ladies take such an interest in horses. You are a rarity, Miss Holbrook.’

‘Am I?’ Caroline looked at him as he handed her up. ‘I have loved horses since I was first able to walk down to the stables with my father…dogs, too. Proper dogs, I mean, not the fancy lapdogs that many ladies dote on. At home I like to walk with them, sometimes for hours at a time.’ She laughed. ‘Indeed, I think I prefer being out with my dogs to talking to some of the people I have met in town.’ She drew a sharp breath as she realised what she had said. ‘Oh, dear, that was not well said. Now you will think me a country bore and I shall be ruined.’

‘Not at all,’ Freddie said. ‘You have too much intelligence and vivacity to be a bore.’

‘I shall take that as a compliment.’

‘Well, you may do so, for it was meant as one.’

‘Thank you. Do you have a country estate, sir?’

‘I have three at the moment,’ Freddie said. ‘A hunting lodge in Oxfordshire, my family seat in Derbyshire and a shooting box in Scotland, which I seldom use. It was set up by my maternal grandfather and came to me on his death, but I prefer to spend much of my time in London.’

‘Oh…yes, I see,’ Caroline said. ‘I suppose the country does not appeal to everyone, though I believe I prefer it.’

‘The countryside can be pleasant enough if one has the right companions. But I do not care to spend too much time alone there when my friends are in town.’

‘Yes, of course. Do you have no family, sir?’

‘I had an elder sister, but she died of a putrid fever when a child.’ His eyes darkened as if the memory still held echoes of pain for him. ‘My parents had both died some years earlier, so that meant I was left to the mercy of the servants—and occasional visits from my uncle and grandfather. Grandfather died when I fifteen, but my uncle still lives. As does my godmother, Lady Stroud.’

‘I had no idea.’ Caroline glanced at him, for she guessed that he must have felt lonely as a child, but his face was a mask that showed no sign of emotion.

‘Why should you? It was a long time ago. However, you must not be sorry. If I have few relatives, I have some good friends and many pleasant acquaintances.’

‘Oh, yes,’ Caroline agreed. ‘I believe you are very close with Mr Bellingham, are you not?’

‘We have been friends for some time.’

They were entering the park gates now and Caroline saw several ladies and gentlemen she knew. Some were in carriages, but most were on foot.

‘Would you count that gentleman as a friend?’ Caroline asked after they had been driving for some minutes. She had noticed Mr Farringdon. He was on foot and seemed to be staring fixedly in their direction.

‘An acquaintance. I believe his estate is not far distant from my hunting lodge, but I would not count him a friend. We meet at the card tables and at various functions.’

‘Yes, I suppose you must play with so many gentlemen at the tables,’ Caroline said, looking thoughtful. ‘Papa was not lucky at cards. I think it is not always wise to gamble too much.’

‘You are very right, though the golden rule is to play only if you can pay.’

‘Ah, yes, very true—but I think that gaming has brought more than one gentleman to ruin.’

‘I am sure that is so. The devil of it is that one can do nothing to prevent it. When someone has the need for self-destruction, no cautionary words will help.’ Freddie was thoughtful for a moment and then he glanced at her. ‘But tell me, do you go to Lady Rowe’s affair tomorrow?’

‘Yes, indeed we shall,’ Caroline replied, allowing his wish to change the subject. ‘Shall you be there, sir?’

‘It was my intention, but I have business that takes me to Oxford, though I hope to return within a few days.’

‘Oh…’ Caroline knew a pang of disappointment. ‘Well, I suppose you must settle your affairs.’

‘I must speak to my agent urgently,’ Freddie told her. ‘There are certain things that must be seen to at my estate and…elsewhere.’ He smiled at her. ‘Do you intend to stay in town until the end of the Season?’

‘I am not sure…’ Caroline wrinkled her brow in thought. ‘For some weeks yet, I believe, but it depends…on many things.’

‘Just so,’ Freddie agreed. ‘Tell me, Miss Holbrook, have you progressed with your reading?’

They began to discuss the merits of Mrs Radcliffe’s writing, passing on to the discussion of literature and poetry. The park was full of people that morning, and, as they made their rounds, they were hailed by Mr Bellingham, who was driving Julia that morning.

Caroline was sorry when they completed their turn of the park and returned to her aunt’s house. She smiled and thanked Sir Frederick for his company, and went in feeling oddly out of sorts with herself. She had enjoyed driving with him, but was still uncertain whether, if asked, he would count her as a friend or merely an acquaintance.

Freddie left town that afternoon, his thoughts much exercised by his conversation with Miss Holbrook. She had begun to pop into his mind too often of late, but he had not yet come to a decision concerning his future plans. If he cared to marry, Miss Holbrook was exactly the kind of lively young woman he would wish to make his wife—though he would not wish his offer to be accepted simply for the sake of his wealth and rank. He supposed that in time he must marry, for it was his duty to produce an heir, as his uncle had no children to carry on the family name. However, he would not wish to marry for such a reason.

It would be unfair to the lady and to him. He firmly believed that there must be genuine respect and affection on both sides for a marriage to work—and therein lay the rub, for he could not suppose that he had found much favour in the lady’s eyes even if she had caused him a restless night or two. He knew that her careless remark about becoming a duchess had been made out of pique, but it might not be far from the truth. He had noticed that one or two of her suitors were more than a little interested and some were his equal in birth, if not quite in wealth. Was it possible that Miss Holbrook—or her mama—was waiting for the highest bidder? Caroline might be feigning indifference so as to arouse his interest the more.

Freddie had been used to living much as he pleased, and was answerable to no one for his actions. If he were to marry, he would need to make changes to his lifestyle and his various houses. What would do for a bachelor would not do for a lady, particularly one with modern tastes and a lively mind.

Yes, he must consider carefully while he was away. In the meantime, however, he had other more pressing matters on his mind…

It was as well for Caroline that the next few days were too full to allow her time for reflection. It seemed that she went from one affair to the next, sometimes attending more than one event in the same evening. If it was not Almack’s, it was a private dance or a card evening, and she met the same people with amazing regularity.

She had begun to realise that there were very few gentlemen she would be happy to see every day of her life. Most of them seemed good mannered and pleasant, but that spark was missing, the vital element that made her feel so much more alive. There were actually no more than two or three in whose company she felt truly able to be herself. Mr Bellingham was perhaps the kindest of her acquaintance and she was usually happiest when with him and Julia Fairchild, who had become a particular friend.

Nearly a week had passed before she saw Sir Frederick again. However, he was with Mr Bellingham and Julia as she entered Mrs Ashton’s large drawing room that Saturday evening. Her breath caught in her throat, and all at once her heart began to beat very fast. It was so very pleasant to see him again. She fanned herself delicately, for she believed that her cheeks must be flushed.

Oh, no, this was foolish! She must control her feelings. It would not do for her to show any sign of partiality this early in their acquaintance. He would think she was setting her cap at him! Even though Julia was making signs to her, she would not go to join them just yet.

They had all been invited for the pleasure of having supper, listening to music or playing cards. Some of the gentlemen were already playing cards at tables set up at the far end of the room, but Sir Frederick, Mr Bellingham and Julia were standing near the French windows, which opened on to the terrace, possibly because the room was already warm. She smiled at Julia, and then turned to the elderly lady who had come to greet Lady Taunton, schooling herself to patience. In a little while she would excuse herself and join her own friends.

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