The Doctor

‘So, Eva is your daughter?’ Emily said, still struggling to believe it.

‘Yes. She has the same genetic condition that I have and that killed my son. The difference is Eva was born with it. The damage was being done while she was in the womb. My son never looked like that, but I love Eva as I loved my son and always try to do my best for her.’

Emily held her gaze. ‘I am sorry. I’d no idea. I mean, I knew you were ill and you’d lost another child, but I’d no idea Eva was living here.’

‘That was our intention. No one knows. Our son spent all his life in and out of hospital. There was nothing they could do to save him. We don’t want the same for Eva. We had to move from our last house because someone passing saw her at the window. News spread that we had a monster in the house. That’s what they used to call her – our pet monster.’

‘That’s dreadful,’ Emily gasped.

‘Yes, yobs would gather outside and throw stones at the windows and push things through our letter box. You understand now why we have all this security?’

‘Yes I do. I can’t have helped by cutting the hedge.’

‘No. But you weren’t to know.’

‘Don’t you have any help? Surely the social services can offer something? Shouldn’t they know?’

‘They offered help a long time ago when Eva was born, but we refused. They will keep wanting to take her into hospital, like they did our son, and it doesn’t do any good. The doctors can’t help. Eva stays upstairs; the main bedroom has been converted for her use. She is comfortable and has everything she needs. It has become more difficult looking after her since I became ill, but I manage.’

‘Do you?’ Emily asked sceptically. ‘Supposing I hadn’t been here today. What would you have done?’

‘Phoned Amit at work. He would be annoyed, but he always comes eventually. I was about to when I saw on the CCTV it was you at the door. I thought I could trust you. I can, can’t I?’ She looked worried.

‘You mean trust me not to tell anyone?’ Emily asked. Alisha nodded. ‘I suppose so, but don’t you ever take her out?’

‘No. She doesn’t need to go out. She has everything she wants upstairs.’

‘But don’t you need to go out?’ Emily persisted, feeling Alisha was a prisoner in her own home. She glanced at Robbie who had his face pressed to the patio window.

‘I can’t leave Eva alone. She was the reason I could only visit you for fifteen minutes. You were so insistent, I felt it was easier to accept your invitation so you wouldn’t keep asking me.’

‘Sorry, I was just trying to be friendly. I’d no idea …’ her voice fell away.

Alisha raised a small smile. ‘It’s fine. I would have liked for us to be friends, but Amit said you’d tell if you found out.’

Emily shrugged. ‘I would probably have told Ben. We share most things.’

‘Please don’t tell him. I don’t want to have to move again and if Amit found out he’d be very angry. He spends every night working in his lab, trying to find a cure, not just for me, but Eva too and others with the same condition. I doubt he will, time is running out, but it has become his obsession. His way of coping.’

Just for a moment Emily felt a pang of guilt that she had judged him so harshly. There were clearly worse obsessions than trying to save your wife and child. She also felt she couldn’t just walk away without offering something. ‘I understand why you don’t go out, so perhaps Robbie and I could come here again to visit you?’

‘Oh I don’t know,’ Alisha said, concerned. ‘I mean, I’d like that but …’ She looked at Robbie. ‘Wouldn’t he say something to his father?’

‘No, he only has single words at present – mummy, daddy, car, that type of thing. I could pop in when it suits you. No one would know. But only if you want me to.’

‘Yes, I’d like that. I really would. I get so lonely, but you must promise never to tell anyone.’ Fear appeared in her eyes again.

‘I promise,’ Emily said.

‘Early afternoon is good for me,’ Alisha said, visibly brightening. ‘After I’ve given Eva her lunch, and I know Amit will be in the operating theatre all afternoon.’

‘Great. Pick your day.’

‘How about this Friday? At two o’clock.’

‘Suits me. Do you have a mobile?’

‘No. Only the house phone.’

‘I’ll give you my mobile number just in case you need me again in an emergency.’

‘Thank you.’ Alisha found a pen and sheet of paper and wrote it down. ‘I’ll keep it somewhere safe.’ She smiled.

‘See you Friday then.’

‘I’ll look forward to it.’

Chapter Sixteen

That night, Emily stood at her bedroom window gazing into the clear still air. As usual, the light was on in Amit Burman’s lab, although nothing could be seen but the faint glow around the very edge of the opaque film and blinds. Ben was downstairs finishing off a report for work and she’d come up for an early night. She was tired. Exhausted. She’d worn herself out thinking about what she’d seen and learnt at Alisha’s that afternoon. How she would have liked to have confided in Ben. Share the burden of this, as she normally shared most things with him. Her thoughts were in chaos, she needed some perspective on what she’d found out, but to do so would break her promise to Alisha, and she couldn’t risk the consequences of doing that. If she told Ben, he could let it slip to Amit. They often exchanged a few words when they saw each other going in or out of the houses. Ben was as honest as they came and wasn’t good at keeping secrets or telling lies. But the fact that she was the only one apart from the Burmans who knew they had a child was a huge responsibility. At the time Alisha had explained the reasons for keeping Eva secret it had seemed rational, but now Emily wasn’t so sure.

Supposing something dreadful happened in that house and she hadn’t told anyone? Wouldn’t she be partly responsible and to blame? Parents under huge pressure, such as the Burmans were, must sometimes snap and the result could be devastating. The strain must be enormous and Alisha had admitted Amit was obsessed with finding a cure, although it was obvious that Eva could never be cured. Might there come a time when he realized this and it all became too much and he lost it? Theirs wouldn’t be the first family to be found slaughtered in their beds after a parent had suffered a breakdown and run berserk. Perhaps he was already at breaking point, Emily thought, and she was the only one who knew Eva was there. It was a confidence she wished she didn’t have.

Her mobile phone, already on her bedside cabinet for the night, began to vibrate behind her. She turned from the window. Their bedside clock showed it was after ten o’clock. It wouldn’t be her parents or friends phoning at this time. Nuisance call? She picked up the phone and saw the call was coming from a local landline number, although not one the phone recognized as a contact. Something stopped her from letting it go through to voicemail and she pressed to accept the call. ‘Hello?’

‘Emily?’ a small female voice asked tentatively. It was vaguely familiar but so slight it was impossible to place.

‘Yes. Who is it?’

‘Alisha. I am so worried.’

‘Oh Alisha. What’s the matter?’ Concern immediately kicked in, but why was she phoning when Amit was home?’

‘I’m in trouble, Emily. I’ve just realized that your visit today will all be recorded on our CCTV. If Amit sees it, he will be furious. I don’t know what to do. You must never come here again. It was wrong of me to ask you for help. I don’t know what to do.’

‘Calm down,’ Emily said and returned to the window. The light was still on the outbuilding. ‘Amit is in his shed, isn’t he?’

‘Yes, for now, but supposing he looks at the recording? He does sometimes. If he checks it, he’ll see you’ve been here.’

‘Can you delete part of the recording? We haven’t got CCTV, but I’m guessing you can.’

‘I think so, but I don’t know how.’ Emily heard the panic and desperation in her voice.

‘There must be a control box somewhere. How do you control it?’ Emily asked, watching the outbuilding for any sign that Amit might be leaving it.

‘There’s a box under the television. Amit views the recordings on our TV. I’ve seen him do it.’

‘And he hasn’t viewed it yet today?’

‘No.’

‘So delete the bit where I arrive and leave.’

‘Yes, but how?’ Alisha’s hysteria grew.

‘Calm down. It can’t be that difficult. Are you in the living room now?’

‘Yes.’

‘Have you got the remote control there?’

‘Yes. It’s on the table.’

‘Look at it now while Amit is in the lab. I’m in my bedroom. I can see him from here if he leaves.’

Alisha fell silent and Emily concentrated on the outbuilding. ‘I’ve found the channel it’s on,’ Alisha said at last.

‘Good. Can you see a main menu?’

A short pause then, ‘Yes.’

‘Click on the menu,’ Emily said. ‘I’m guessing there will be something that says device.’

Silence again. Emily hoped Ben wouldn’t choose this moment to come up. She’d have difficulty explaining what she was doing.

‘Got it,’ Alisha said.

‘Right, move the recording to the bit just before I arrive.’

‘How?’ Alisha’s panic rose again.

‘Try to stay calm. There must be a way of rewinding it. Some little arrows maybe, pointing backwards?’

Another silence. ‘Yes. Here they are. Shall I click on it?’

‘Yes.’

A second later. ‘It’s rewinding.’

‘Good.’ Emily watched the outbuilding, her mouth dry and her pulse racing. Alisha’s fear and anxiety were contagious.

A minute later, ‘I’m back to where you arrive.’

‘OK, now press delete and keep deleting until just after I’ve gone.’

‘Yes, I’m doing it.’

Emily waited. She could hear Alisha’s breath coming fast and shallow.

‘Done it.’

‘Good. If Amit finds out, just act dumb and say you don’t know anything about it. He’ll think its malfunctioning.’

‘I think I must be dumb,’ Alisha said.

‘No. You just panicked. Are you OK now?’

‘Yes.’

At that moment, the light went off in the outbuilding and the door opened. ‘Alisha, Amit’s leaving now. Is the television back to normal viewing?’

‘Yes.’

‘Try to relax and stay calm. Do what you would usually do. I’ll see you Friday. You can switch off the CCTV before I arrive and then put it back on after I’ve gone, but we’ll speak again before then.’

‘Yes. Thank you.’ The line went dead.

Emily stayed by the window and watched Amit Burman as he carefully padlocked the door of the outbuilding and then began up the path towards the house. Alisha’s fear of being discovered had unsettled Emily. She had been panic-stricken. Genuinely afraid. Emily had heard it in her voice. Why, if Amit really was looking after her, as Alisha had claimed? She had doubts now.

Emily drew the curtains and then saved Alisha’s house phone number to the list of contacts in her mobile, just in case it should ever be needed.

Chapter Seventeen

‘It’s off, I’ve switched it off!’ Alisha declared, having phoned Emily’s mobile at 1.55 on Friday. Emily heard her sense of achievement and the excitement in her voice.

‘Great. Well done. I’ll be round in five minutes. Just putting Robbie into his coat.’

‘See you soon.’

Alisha was waiting behind her front door and ready to open it as soon as Emily and Robbie approached. She was smiling, wearing a lovely dress and had styled her hair.

‘You look nice,’ Emily said, helping Robbie over the doorstep.

‘Thank you. I thought I should make an effort. You always look very fashionable. It’s so long since I had a visitor.’ Alisha quickly closed the door. ‘You and Robbie can sit in the living room while I make us some tea. Oh, but I need to take your coats first,’ she flustered. ‘Sorry, I forgot.’

‘Don’t worry,’ Emily said and slipped off her coat, touched by just how much their visit meant to Alisha. It nearly hadn’t happened. The day before, she’d had to spend ages on the phone persuading Alisha that the sky wouldn’t fall in if she switched off the CCTV for a while.

Emily handed their coats to Alisha, who hung them in the under-stairs cupboard.

‘Please go through to the living room and make yourself comfortable,’ she said a little formally. ‘I found some of Eva’s toys from when she was younger for Robbie to play with.’

‘Great,’ Emily said. Taking hold of Robbie’s hand, she steered him into the living room while Alisha went into the kitchen to make tea.

Laid out on the rug by the hearth was a collection of brightly coloured early years activity toys. They were similar to the ones Robbie had at home with buttons and knobs that could be turned and pressed to make different sounds, music, numbers, words and letters. Robbie toddled over to investigate as Emily sat on the sofa and looked down the garden. While her own garden was very bare in winter – a sea of lifeless twigs and brown earth – this garden was largely evergreen, with a screen of shrubs all around the edges forming a tall hedge. The one she’d cut between their gardens was shorter than those on the other two sides and she felt another stab of guilt. But she hadn’t known then that they were there to stop prying eyes from seeing Eva.

‘Please help yourself,’ Alisha said, returning with a tray set with tea and a plate of pastry savouries.

‘Wow. You’ve been busy,’ Emily enthused, impressed. ‘These look delicious.’

‘It was nice to cook something different. Eva’s food is very simple and Amit often eats at work.’

Emily took a couple of the pastries and put them on the plate Alisha gave to her, together with tea in a white bone-china cup and saucer.

‘What about Robbie?’ Alisha asked. ‘Does he want anything?’

‘He’s all right for now, he’s just had lunch.’ Emily settled back, took a sip of her tea and a bite of one of the pastries. ‘Very nice,’ she said. Alisha smiled, pleased. ‘So, you worked out how to switch off the cameras, well done. And you know how to switch them on again?’ she asked.

‘Yes. It’s simple when you know how. I’d never had a reason to learn how to use it before.’

‘You seemed very worried that Amit might find out.’

‘He …’ she stopped.

‘Yes?’ Emily prompted.

‘Amit has a lot on his mind and he can sometimes become angry over little things, but everything is all right, really. It was nice of you to help me.’

Emily gave a half-hearted nod. ‘No worries.’ Perhaps with time Alisha would confide in her. ‘What exactly does Amit do in that outbuilding?’ she asked as she had before. ‘I know you said it was research to try to find a cure for your illness, but how?’

‘I don’t know the details,’ Alisha replied, avoiding Emily’s gaze. ‘And I don’t ask questions.’

‘You’re very good. I’m sure I’d ask,’ Emily returned with a small irreverent laugh.

‘But you’re different to me,’ Alisha said, and looked sad. ‘You’re more confident and do as you wish. You feel you can speak your mind.’

‘Too much sometimes,’ Emily said. ‘So tell me to shut up when you’ve had enough.’

‘I wouldn’t do that,’ Alisha said seriously. ‘I am pleased you came. But I honestly don’t know what Amit does in his lab and I wouldn’t question him.’

‘Ben is jealous. He calls it a man cave. He wants one,’ Emily laughed.

‘I’m sure Ben would much rather spend his time with you and Robbie in the evenings and weekends than in a building at the bottom of the garden.’

Emily saw Alisha’s hurt and disappointment. ‘Yes, I suppose he would really,’ she said quietly and took another sip of her tea. ‘I’ve accepted Tibs isn’t coming back,’ she said, changing the subject.

‘I am sorry. Will you have another cat?’

‘Maybe in the future, although Ben would like a dog.’

‘It’s such a pity she didn’t come home. When I found her collar, I was hopeful it had just come off and she would return.’

Emily set her cup in her saucer and stared at her. ‘You found the collar? I thought Amit found it?’

‘No, I found it just outside our back door. Amit returned it to you.’

‘It wasn’t in the road then?’

‘No. Didn’t Amit explain?’

‘Yes, but I’m sure he said he’d found it in the road.’

‘You must have misunderstood. It was outside our back door. I was putting out some rubbish and found it by the bin.’

‘I see,’ Emily said thoughtfully. ‘I don’t suppose it matters.’

‘No,’ Alisha agreed.

But it did matter.

‘Why would Amit lie about where and who found Tibs’ collar?’ Emily asked Ben that evening. She had told him she’d seen Alisha briefly when she’d taken a parcel there.

‘I don’t suppose he lied on purpose,’ Ben said with a small sigh. ‘It was probably just a mistake. The bloke got home knackered from work and his wife started going on about the cat collar and that he had to return it. So he quickly scribbles a note and pushes it through our letter box, then you rush round and cross-examine him. He says he found it in the road, which is the most likely place if a cat has been run over. It was a mistake, that’s all. No evil intent.’

‘But Alisha never goes out as far as the road. How could he make that mistake?’ Emily persisted.

‘What are you talking about, Em?’ Ben said testily. ‘She came here once, didn’t she? Of course she goes out sometimes. Just not very far as she’s ill.’

She looked at him and realized how ridiculous it must sound if you didn’t know the full story – that Alisha couldn’t go out, not so much because of her illness but because she had a severely disabled daughter whom she couldn’t leave. There was no doubt in Emily’s mind that Alisha’s version of events was true and, for whatever reason, Amit Burman had lied, but she knew she needed to let it go. She was starting to sound obsessive, and Ben’s comment about Amit arriving home from work knackered and his wife going on at him about the cat collar was surely a dig at her.

‘Sorry, I won’t mention it again.’ She kissed his cheek. ‘Tell me about your day at work.’

Chapter Eighteen

It mattered, Alisha also thought that evening, and it had worried her since Emily had left. It had plagued and dominated her thoughts. She’d done her best to hide her surprise and concern when Emily had told her what Amit had said about Tibs’ collar, but after Emily had gone she’d found it impossible to think of anything else. She felt unsettled, anxious and couldn’t understand why Amit had lied to Emily. Without doubt he had known he wasn’t the one who’d found the cat collar, and she’d told him exactly where she’d found it. So why had he told Emily he’d found it in the road? Had he forgotten what she’d said? Unlikely. He rarely forgot anything and he’d taken the collar round straight away; there hadn’t been time to forget. ‘I’ll return it,’ he’d said, snatching it from her and placing it in an envelope.

Alisha liked Emily a lot, she acknowledged. She seemed a genuine sort of person who could be relied upon, and she trusted her not to tell anyone – even Ben – about Eva. She was pleased they were becoming friends; indeed, Emily was the only friend she had now. Amit had seen to that, telling her old friends she was too ill to meet them or come to the phone, so eventually they’d stopped calling. But now she had Emily, and it felt safe having her telephone number and knowing she was just next door. She’d enjoyed Emily and Robbie’s visit and now she was confident in working the CCTV and could switch it off and on they could visit any time and Amit would never know. She’d already made a date for their next visit. Yes, she liked Emily and wanted to do right by her.

Alisha was suddenly jolted into the present by something she’d just thought. The CCTV. Now she was competent at using it why didn’t she rewind it to the day she’d found the collar? It might give a clue as to how it had got there, even to where Tibs was, then she could tell Emily. She’d be so pleased to know, even if it was bad news. Emily had said it was the not knowing what had happened to Tibs that was the worst. There was a camera pointing down the sideway that covered the back door. Amit was in his lab for the evening and wouldn’t reappear for hours.

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